Presented In 365 MM

My Favorite Fifty of 2009

2010-07-15T11:29:00.000-07:00

While such a list might seem frivolous at this stage in my film blog, I still felt it a necessary point to provide closure to the project. Furthermore, probably the greater purpose of this post is to provide a breakdown of some "must see films" for those of you who share my movie tastes. Keep in mind that these are not the fifty films I felt were objectively the best. This list is entirely subjective and is comprised of my favorite fifty films that I saw last year (that ranking based solely on enjoyability). I didn't count entries that I'd seen before, in part or in whole ("Shawshank Redemption," "Phase IV," "The Last Wave," etc) nor did I count seasons of television shows ("Dexter," "Twin Peaks," MST3K entries). In creating this list, I simply collected the titles for all the films I ranked at a 4/5 or higher and asked myself: "If I could watch only one of these movies again, which would it be?" and after one was selected, I continued in that manner. Preamble aside, here's the breakdown. (Note: all my reviews of these films are still posted on this blog).

1. Picnic at Hanging Rock - A brilliant exercise in atmosphere and obsession. My late best friend hailed it as one of his favorite films and as such, one of my great regrets is not having watched this with him.

2. Into the Wild - A more romantic depiction of a life on the road there has never been. It was the perfect film to watch on my road trip to the Grand Canyon and I struggled to fight back man tears.

3. Le Cercle Rouge - Jean-Pierre Melville at his finest, demonstrating that the French really are badasses.

4. Day of the Locust - Hysterical and terrifying all at once, this is a film I keep revisiting like a hard drug.

5. Inglorious Basterds - Tarantino's finest slice of cinematic masturbation to date - history told from a thirteen year-old's mentality.

6. Dementia - A nightmarish, dialog-free film noir that still leaves me amazed that it was ever made, much less in the 1950's.

7. Russian Ark - The yang to Dementia's yin, this dreamy tour through three-hundred years of Russian history concentrates more on mesmerizing the viewer than educating him.

8. The Lost Skeleton Returns Again - Hands down, the funniest film I saw last year. There were times I feared I was going to vomit from long segues of guffawing.

9. Black Narcissus - I became a fan of the Powell/Pressberger team through a number of their opuses, but this Technicolor marvel is their masterpiece.

10. Fitzcarraldo - A character study of a hopeless dreamer and a madman that also serves as an allegory for the Herzog's uncanny filmmaking.

11. Peur(s) du Noir - At it's worst, this film is a bit uneven, but it's anthology of sumptuous ghost stories told through varying forms of excellent animation is still a welcome change from the conventional animated fare.

12. Seance on a Wet Afternoon - A meditative caper surrounding a delusional psychic and her henpecked hubby is, at times, more Hitchcockian than Hitchcock.

13. Interstella 5555 - Basing a story around a preexisting pop CD is a unique concept for an animated film and thankfully the result is a kinetic, pumping ride.

14. Long Weekend - A film that continues to chill me upon repeat viewings and a paranoia-infused story that redefines the animal-attack genre for horror.

15. District 9 - The best surprise of 2009's summer, this allegory of apartheid and the foolhardy measures to alleviate it was as through-provoking as it was entertaining.

16. Europa - From the moment Max von Sydow's voice carries you into another world, this hypnotic, post-war world, you're hooked, and in the end, you're left thinking what a shame it is that this film represents the zenith of everything Lars von Trier has worked so hard to eschew in his filmmaking.

17. A Face in the Crowd - There's no looking at Andy Griffith the same after he uses his "aw shucks" grin and guitar strumming to woo America into feeding his crazed, megalomaniacal ways.

18. Hot Fuzz - How do you make one of the best parodies of the action genre possible? Easy - you create a caricature of the genre, filled with more fights and explosions than can be counted and the laughs come naturally.

19. Zombieland - Two overtired genres: the zombie flick and the "awkward teen wants the girl" romedy are infused with new life in this delightful amalgamation.

20. The Big Clock - Ticking with more tension than the name may suggest, Charles Laughton steals the scene as a punctuality-obsessed murderer who was undoubtedly the inspiration for Bob Kane's Clock King.

21. King of Kong - Competition in the video game world never looked fiercer than it does in this documentary set on the 8-bit plane.

22. Vampire Circus - This epitome of "guilty pleasure" still has never received a DVD release, which is a shame since it's one of the most entertaining entries in the Hammer Studios legacy.

23. Withnail & I - Richard Griffiths steals the show as a licentious thespian who lusts after the drug-addled duo of protagonists in this comedy that could be easily likened to "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas."

24. Ace in the Hole - Billy Wilder and Kirk Douglas are both at the top of their game in this social commentary on corruption in the media - a theme that continues to resonate today.

25. Onibaba - A stylish, cautionary tale about succumbing to temptation that unfolds like a folk tale told around the fire.

26. Elephant - Gus Van Sant's depiction of a school shooting makes the pit of your stomach drop because it provides no easy, Hollywood-inspired heroes or cliches, making it seem all too real.

27. Waltz with Bashir - The fact that this did not win the Best Animated Oscar is proof as to how Pixar-centric the Academy is, especially since the animation is used to mask the traumatic memories of war rather than to make an animal talk for the sake of easy entertainment. Then again, it probably would have won had it not been released the same year as...

28. WALL-E - I still find "Waltz with Bashir" the more powerful of the two films, but damned if that little robot doesn't tug at the heart-strings by exhibiting more humanity than most actors.

29. Burn, Witch, Burn - Superstition and witchcraft are at the heart of this tale that analyzes how a rational man would deal with the supernatural if confronted with it.

30. Dead Ringers - I long felt that Jeremy Irons was the shit. Watching him turn in two tortured performances in the roles of twin gynecologists is just the icing on the cake.

31. Star Trek - This film easily ranks up there with "Casino Royale" or "Batman Begins" in terms of franchise reboots that failed to disappoint (all of it's implausibilities aside).

32. Yellow Submarine - Who needs drugs when the movie takes care of the acid trips for you?

33. Elevator to the Gallows - A darkly humorous slice of French New Wave surrounding a "perfect plan" that goes horrendously awry thanks to a weekend stay in an elevator.

34. Paths of Glory - This dethrones "Joyeux Noel" as my favorite World War I film, both for its dark tone and for the simple fact that George MacReady is so damned surreptitious and evil.

35. Murder on the Orient Express - A cavalcade of prominent actors, headed by Albert Finney, makes this the most enjoyable Poirot adaptation I've seen to date.

36. Downfall - Before it became an Internet meme, this film was a heart-wrenching look at Hitler's last days in his bunker.

37. The Shout - Another Aussie flick that leaves the viewer wondering where Aboriginal spirituality ends and insanity begins thanks to its unreliable narrator.

38. Atonement - Simply put: tracking shots don't make a movie, but I'll be damned if they don't make them memorable.

39. L.A. Confidential - This sizzling neo-noir made a handful of careers (Crowe, Pearce, Basinger, etc) with its outstanding story...to bad the nation was too swept up in Titanic Fever in 1997.

40. To Live - Before Yimou Zhang became famous for his visual style in films like "Hero" or "House of Flying Daggers," he made a heartwarming yarn about the strength of family in times of turmoil and national upheaval.

41. Kiss of Death - I never understood why either Victor Mature or Richard Widmark had the "star status" they did until I saw them show their dark sides (particularly by the latter) in this depraved story of betrayal in the criminal underworld.

42. Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid - My pal Dave Levy said it best: "The greatest character actor film of all time."

43. Crimes and Misdemeanors - Woody Allen's most introspective drama yields the performance of a career by Martin Landau as an opthamologist who contemplates murder as an easy out to an adulterous affair.

44. Madamoiselle - Jeanne Moreau plays her role like a clenched fist in this cinematic psychoanalysis of the madness that can arise as a result of repressed sexuality.

45. The Wrestler - I can understand Mickey Rourke not winning Best Actor for his performance in this film, for it is an accommodating allegory for many elements of his life. That still doesn't diminish it's powerhouse impact on your heart.

46. Advise and Consent - Typically the terms 'political' and 'thriller' are to words that I find contradictory. Not so in Preminger's scathing critique of the United States' political machine.

47. The Lives of Others - A superb story that exhibits the curse of conscience in wartime (even during a Cold War).

48. Election - Despite my being a teacher and finding the humor all too real, Alexander Payne's directorial debut is still a fabulous mockery of the politics and education.

49. My Dinner With Andre - Logically speaking, a two-hour film that's nothing more than a filmed conversation sounds boring as hell, but damned if I didn't find myself as engrossed in the anecdotes as Wallace Shawn does.

50. Timecrimes - I was actually torn between this film and "Primer" for rounding out the list. Ironic since both are tales of time travel that dismiss flicks like "Back to the Future" as nonsense and positively boggle the mind.

Days 347-361: Titles and Ranks will vary

2010-07-06T17:31:00.000-07:00

Okay, despite my having summer off from job #2, I seem to have my time consumed just as bad as before. Ergo, I'll try to sum up the final fifteen films I took in during my year of "a new movie a day" as succinctly as possible. Yes, I know it's sad that I stay busy to the point that it's come to this. C'est la vie, I suppose. Anyway, while I sadly fell short of my 2009 New Year's Resolution, it was only by four entries. I've been consoled that technically, I probably exceeded the goal, since I counted entire television series seasons as a single entry (like the 22 hours of Twin Peaks Season Two was counted the same as an hour and a half film would be), but I don't share such sentiment. Be that as it may, it was still a fun experiment that got me indulging in a number of films that I may never have seen. That being said, here are the last fifteen I've been needing to review for seven months (shit, I am lazy):

Day 347: Blackboard Jungle (1955) - Rank 3.5/5 - A melodramatic look at tough schools and the instructors that grapple with the mad students that roam their halls. This film sparked the creation of a subgenre that has influenced countless followers (from Dead Poets Society to Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit), including yet another treacly subgenre, the inspirational sports movie (Coach Carter, Friday Night Lights, etc.) Glenn Ford turns in an excellent performance and even Sidney Poitier makes an early appearance as a thug - a bad bit of karma that would come to bite him in the ass as we see with the next entry...

Day 348: To Sir, With Love (1967) - Rank 4/5 - The plot of this film is essentially the same as "Blackboard Jungle," except Poitier is now on the defensive end as the school instructor. Less ass-kicking and more love power than its predecessor makes it seem a little less dated, though not by much. It's Poitier's performance that makes this movie.

Day 349: The Prize (1963) - Rank 3.5/5 - Paul Newman stars as a Nobel Prize winner in Literature who bumbles into uncovering a kidnapping plot surrounding a German physicist (Edward G. Robinson). The film bears a remarkable Hitchcockian influence and it's far more enthralling than Newman and Hitchcock's collaboration - "Torn Curtain." However, there are moments where it seems like the director is working too hard to pay homage to the master of suspense, sacrificing serious tension in the process.

Day 350: A Scanner Darkly (2006) - Rank 4.5/5 - Paranoia-fueled double-dealing in a not-too-distant future injects a great deal of life into this animated Richard Linklater adaptation of a Philip K. Dick tale. Reeves turns in an excellent performance, all jokes about his wooden soliloquizing aside, as an undercover cop that begins to lose both his mind and his identity while investigating a motley crew of eccentric hoods (Robert Downey Jr., Woody Harrelson, etc.). The unique blend of conspiracy madness and psychedelic animation leaves you with a high after watching.

Day 351: King of Kings (1961) - Rank 3.5/5 - An epic in the vein of "Ben-Hur" and "The Ten Commandments." This time, the Christian topic of cinema is the life of Jesus Christ. Such a theme could easily turn into a dogmatic slice of Catholic propaganda, but the religious themes never feel overbearing (granted, that's coming from someone who was raised Catholic, so I'm sure my objectivity is a tad skewed, but I scarcely think of myself as having an altar boy mentality). Production values are as lavish as the palace of Herod (and Salome's dance for John the Baptist's head is quite the spectacle). The performances are acceptable, but far from exceptional, though be sure to watch for Rip Torn in an early role as Judas.

Day 352: Earth Vs. the Flying Saucers (1956) - Rank 3/5 - If you can't determine the plot of the movie by the title, then it's a sad state of affairs for you. The plot is a fairly conventional one - aliens start attacking Earth after the foolish humans take the offensive position at the onset of the film's exposition. However, what makes it more nostalgic and watchable are the special effects by Ray Harryhausen, which boast a destruction of Washington D.C., paving the scorched way for Joe Viskocil.

Day 353: Warrior of the Lost World (1983) - Rank 2/5 - A Mad Max ripoff that features Donald Pleasance humbling himself for a meager paycheck. 'Nuff said.

Day 354: Diner (1982) - Rank 3.5/5 - The film that put Barry Levinson (as well as its stars, such as Steve Guttenberg and Kevin Bacon) on the map is a series of nights spent boasting over greasy burgers and colas. It's akin to the directorial efforts of other auteurs who utilized their Hollywood budgets to recreate their childhoods ("American Graffiti," "Dazed and Confused," "SLC Punk," etc), but the overall tale lacks the cohesion that brings it up to their level.

Day 355: You Can Count On Me (2000)- Rank 4/5 - A single mother's world is turned upside-down when her estranged, rakish brother crashes back into her life. What could have easily been a conventional and forgettable plot is made noteworthy be outstanding performances by Laura Linney, Mark Ruffalo and Matthew Broderick. Even Rory Culkin holds his own. Only writer/director Kenneth Lonergan is painfully intolerable in his brief, self-indulgent role.

Day 356: Little Otik (2004) - Rank 4.5/5 - This Czech folk tale comes across as a nightmare under the guise of the creator behind Alice. A barren wife is gifted with a tree stump carved to resemble a child by her henpecked husband. On the verge of a nervous breakdown, the woman begins to believe that it's really an actual child to the point that the stump comes to life. The result is what you'd get if you slipped acid into Ray Harryhausen's coffee cup. Once the child eats the family cat, leaving behind a mangled pile of fur, blood and bones, the story enters a very dark territory that plunges ever deeper into the horrific realm of disturbing children's tales.

Day 357: Night of the Blood Beast (1958) - Rank 1.5/5 - An astronaut comes back to Earth, dead at first, but later is reanimated, laden with a belly full of aliens. What should have been fun 1950's B-grade horror schlock ended up as an exercise in tedium.

Days 358-360: It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia (2005-2008) - I'd only seen one episode of this show prior to buying the entire series (or at least as many as there are available on DVD). I have no regrets in my spending. The antics of "I Love Lucy" mixed with the indolence and selfishness of "Seinfeld" yields a match made in heaven. Danny DeVito as the foul-mouthed patriarch of this clan of petty individuals is the icing on the cake.

Day 361: Burn, Witch, Burn (1962) - Rank 5/5 - The influence of Richard Matheson on this modern ghost yarn is both obvious and welcome. A professor of folklore learns that his wife is a witch and when he forces her to cease all her "superstitious" ways, he finds himself the target of other masters of the black arts. Comparable with the mood and theme of "Curse of the Demon," this was an excellent finish to my experiment.

Well, there's the last of them. For those one or two people who actually follow this blog, my apologies for my inconsistency in recent months. I have too many projects for my own good...

Day 346: Cache (2006) - Rank 4.5/5

2010-06-18T12:10:00.000-07:00

When we opened this film at the Baxter, I remember the stunning silences that accompanied the credits. Every so often, an art film comes through that leaves our octogenarian base puzzling over what the film was about (as well as wondering where they left their car keys). Needless to say, Michael Hancke's masterwork in repressed memories and emotions excels in ambiguity. Hancke's camerawork and the absence of music in most scenes to add a voyeuristic touch, as if the viewer is a third invisible party to the game that is being played with the target Georges Laurent, as he's plagued with VHS tapes that docuemnt his home and activities and grisly crayon drawings. Furthermore, I would go as far as to say that it's one of the best psychological thrillers I've seen in some time, for as you've probably already surmised, Hancke doesn't sacrifice the atmosphere he's generated by taking on a "clear-cut, Hollywood ending."

Watch the Trailer

Day 345: Fahrenheit 451 (1966) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-06-18T11:49:00.000-07:00

One of Bradbury's most renowned books received a decent screen adaptation thanks to the expertise of Francois Truffaut. For those unfamiliar with the plot, the story is set in a dystopian future where the printed word is outlawed. Guy Montag, the main protagonist, is a professional bookburner - an avocation generated by an amalgamation of Cold War fears as well as references to the Third Reich it seems. Montag decides to indulge in reading when he acquires a text during a routine burning and soon he finds his mindset shifting as the power of reading influences his mind. The story's a solid one and Truffaut's visual sense creates a bleak but visually distinct look for the future (akin to the world created in "A Clockwork Orange"). The film's main drawback is the performance by Oskar Werner as Guy Montag, a role that he woefully underplays. I'm aware that in this fictitious future that he is a mere cog, regulated by perscriptions, and a muting of emotions is to be expected, but Werner is damn near comatose for most of the film (a surprising outcome since he'd collaborated with Truffaut before). At least his performance does not detract from the story's uplifting message.

Watch the Trailer

Day 344: The Corpse Vanishes (1942) - Rank 2/5

2010-05-09T12:57:00.000-07:00

Ah Bela, I'll give you an extra point for ranking because I love you so, but your choice of material...ugh... The premise of the film is a familiar one - a mad scientist, grief-stricken by his wife's unsightly appearance, decides to harvest what he needs from young, nubile, virginal nymphs. Permutations of this set-up include (but certainly aren't limited to) "The Awful Dr. Orlaf," "Eyes without a Face," "The Hand that Feeds the Dead" and..."The Dark Crystal"...yeah. Not a horrendous performance by Lugosi (clearly working as best he could with what he had), but when a 62 minute feature has me anxiously looking at my watch, it's not a good thing.

Watch the Trailer

Day 343: Following (1998) - Rank 4/5

2010-05-09T12:47:00.000-07:00

Before "The Dark Knight," "The Prestige" or even "Memento," Christopher Nolan churned out this delightful slice of neo-noir in grainy, black-and-white 16mmm film stock on the back alleys of London. It focuses on a down-and-out writer who is a "follower" - not to be confused with a stalker, for he changes his target every day - and is carrying out his peculiar habits in the hope that he will find much-needed inspiration. But when one of his marks both spots him, the man strangely welcomes the writer into his shady world of serial burglary. It's not long before the unnamed protagonist finds a load of charges, including murder, dropped in his lap as a result of the association. Nolan's characteristic, nonlinear storytelling is present, and with a great script and cast, it's no wonder that this project put him on the map and sent him on his way to bigger stuff.

Watch the Trailer

Day 342: Le Cercle Rouge (1953) - Rank 5/5

2010-05-08T12:49:00.000-07:00

Over time, Jean-Pierre Melville has grown to be one of my favorite French directors. "Bob le flambeur," "Le Doulos," and "Le Samourai" all smack of brilliance. But, without a doubt, "Le Cercle Rouge" happens to be his best. I know this will come as a slap in the face to those diehards that hold "Le Samourai" atop a pedestal, and rightfully so, since it turns both film noir and French new wave on their heads (like "Le Samourai," this film has a dash of Asian influence). However, the tale of a motley trio - one man an ex-con who rips off the mob on his first day out of jail, the second, an escaped convict and the third, an alcoholic, disgraced detective - out to rob a jewel store is a masterpiece of storytelling. The heist that links the three is reminiscent of "Rififi" but it's not the crux of the tale. The interactions among the three men are complex and subdued, but never convoluted. Clearly Melville at the height of his game, and it's a damned shame the man passed away a mere two years after completing the story.

Watch the Trailer

Day 341: M. Hulot's Holiday (1953) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-05-08T12:35:00.000-07:00

The adventures of Monseuir Hulot have often been cited as the source for countless, social misfits in cinema - from Mr. Bean to Ernest P. Worrell. Writer/director/star Jacques Tati has also been credited as an innovator in the comedy field. This all in mind, I was a bit surprised at how little I found myself laughing aloud. I'd expected to be seized in a fit of apoplectic guffawing at least once in the film, but no dice. Instead, I found myself more fascinated at how the entire plot was one giant Rube Goldberg device, with not only the principal players, but every extra involved having some schtick that interacted with the larger tale. Again, the foibles of all involved were never slapstick nor witty (the film possessing very little spoken dialogue), but despite this, I did have a smile on my face the entire time. So to call the film one of the funniest movies ever made is a gross misjudgment, but to call it one of the most endearing films, I feel, would be quite apropos.

Watch the Trailer

Day 340: The Cars That Ate Paris (1974) - Rank 3/5

2010-05-08T12:27:00.000-07:00

After falling in love with "The Last Wave" and "Picnic at Hanging Rock" both, I became absolutely curious about Peter Weir's earlier work. The initial works of famous directors are always hit or miss, though films like "Hard Eight," "Pi," "Frankenweenie," "Following" and the like have given me newer appreciations for some of my favorite directs. Sadly, that's not really the case here. While "The Cars that Ate Paris" is fun for 1970's drive-in fare, it scarcely seems comparable with Weir's later work, serving as no indication that he could create the films he has. In addition, to watch the film objectively, it leaves me even more unmoved, for the story seems terribly conventional, if not contrived. The idea of a town that profits off of road accidents has humorous potential, but not for an entire film. In the end, it feels like the storyline was created just so the crew would have an excuse to drive cars into buildings. More akin to what I would picture for early Michael Bay, not Weir.

Watch the Trailer

Day 339: There Will Be Blood (2007) - Rank 5/5

2010-05-08T12:17:00.000-07:00

I won't lie - this wasn't my first time watching this film. No, not by such a long shot. Paul Thomas Anderson's masterpiece grows better for me every time, whereas I know that many of my cronies actually begin to see increasing imperfections in its storyline upon repeat viewing. To me, there's something positively fascinating about Daniel Day-Lewis' Daniel Plainview. In short, he's a crazy, selfish sociopath that you find yourself rooting for. Furthermore, the film could also be seen as an allegory (or criticism) of the proverbial "American dream" - that old mentality that any Joe can pull himself up by his bootstraps and become a success in this grand ole country of ours. Plainview does just that, but through diabolical and manipulative means. Milkshake lines or not, you still can't help but smile as he finally bests everyone whom he decides to have a vendetta against. Many questions remain about Plainview after the film, from his motivations to his ultimate outcome, but I'm only left with one query: how on Earth will Anderson top this?

Watch the Trailer

Day 338: Evangelion 1.0: You Are (Not) Alone (2008) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-05-08T12:02:00.000-07:00

I feel like it's hard to rate the film properly, for I'm unfamiliar with the "Neon Genesis: Evangelion" series. Throughout a great deal of the film, I felt as if I should be proclaiming "Bitchin'!" but I lacked the proper context to truly revel in the film's vivid, kinetic glory. Furthermore, this is a film that needs to be reviewed in reference to the original series and I cannot do that either. However, speaking as an objective viewer, who felt more like he was watching part 7 of an ongoing series when he was unfamiliar with the previous installments, I can say the film achieved one major thing of note. It got me intrigued about what I'd missed. There's just something about a series that features antagonists that are an amalgamation of machine, monster, man and myth that is so delightfully quintessential in Japanese animation culture. The "Angels" - creatures that challenge the plucky, young heroes of the tale - possess no set form or power. It varies from one incarnation to the next, not unlike Gozer. 'So,' you ask yourself, 'what you're saying is the series is like a Japanese Ghostbusters?' Um...no, but for simplicity's sake...let's say, yes.

Watch the Trailer

Day 337: Not Quite Hollywood (2009) - Rank 4/5

2010-02-28T11:50:00.000-08:00

"Quentin Tarantino presents" has become synonymous with projects that are worth a watch, though they often pale in comparison to the efforts of their sponsor. "Not Quite Hollywood" came as a strong recommendation to me after I began to devour the Aussie section at Wild and Woolly Video. The recent documentary, which focuses on the struggles and exploits of early, low-budget Australian "Hollywood," is a novel view, nothing more. The film interviews countless folks involved in the drive-in schlock that came out of the land down under in the 1970's and it serves as a great showcase. However, I would liken it to eating at a buffet, for it mainly piques your interest in the films presented rather than satiating your appetite for ozsploitation on the whole. I just found the documentary too one-sided (on the side of the B-movie auteurs, who pooh-poohed other writer/directors of the era, like Peter Weir, more than they talked up their own works), and I'm a man who likes his documentaries as objective as possible. Still, there's no denying that this film resulted in drastic changes of my Netflix queue...

Watch the Trailer

Day 336: The Conversation (1974) - Rank 4.5/5

2010-02-28T11:47:00.000-08:00

This film serves as a testament as to why I love Gene Hackman. Granted, the veteran actor has gotten to the point in his career that often, Gene Hackman is merely playing Gene Hackman (similar to the methods of Jack Nicholson or Christopher Walken). "Superman" is a prime, early example of when that transition began to take place. Be that as it may, "The Conversation" is a fantastic film that remains buried in an atmosphere of suspicion and distrust from the get-go. There's no unnecessary exposition, for the "conversation" in question begins rolling with the credits. I also find it remarkable that Francis Ford Coppola managed to sneak in production of this film between Godfathers. While it may lack the scope of the crime tales that made Coppola famous, the film does contain more layers than an onion, ranking it higher on repeat viewability (if I can be so permitted to make up such a word) than any Godfather installment.
Watch the Trailer

Day 335: The Miracle Worker (1962) - Rank 4.5/5

2010-02-28T11:46:00.000-08:00

Okay, after a horrendous hiatus due to the commitments with my current film project, I'm endeavoring to wrap up the last of last year's reviews in a succinct manner. Succinct scarcely describes the efforts on Annie Sullivan's part to teach young Helen Keller some manner of semblance in the cinematic adaptation of William Gibson's play. Both Anne Bancroft and Patty Duke turn in powerhouse performances as Sullivan and Keller, respectively speaking. While the fights between the two have been the fodder of parody for decades, there's no denying the grueling battle of wits that ensues; one that leaves any viewer genuinely exhausted by the end of the film. And speaking from the viewpoint of a teacher, it makes me admit that my bad days ain't so bad by comparison.

Watch the Trailer

Day 334: The Man Who Fell to Earth (1976) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-02-28T11:43:00.000-08:00

David Bowie is an alien? Well, no shit. Nicolas Roeg directs the singer in a dreamlike satire of the planet Earth. Sent to our world in search of a way to bring water back to his drought-ridden planet, Thomas Newton (Bowie) quickly generates a tremendous wealth by patenting advanced technology from his home (...transparent aluminum?). He soon rises to power and fame, but a fate of dissolution and addition creeps into his life as he falls prey to the very temptations that all other humans do.

The visual style of the film is remarkable, but considering Roeg's background, it's not surprising. Bowie performs surprisingly well, considering that this is his first major role in a film. He receives excellent support from Rip Torn, who refrains from hamming it up too much considering he's in the guise of a rakish, eccentric scientist. "The Man Who Fell to Earth" has a great deal going for it, but it's greatest downfall is its final act, as the film switches gears from Howard's quest to leave the planet to his seeming imprisonment. The film gets lost within itself, not unlike it's lead actor. This rough and almost clumsy transition throws off a smooth exercise in the surreal, snapping the viewer out of the hypnosis Roeg generated and leaving in it's place, confusion. I have to add, in the film's defense, that it has grown on my in retrospect, for the tale of an alien, far greater than any man, falling prey to the banalities of everyday life does play out like a science-fiction parable.

Watch the Trailer

Day 333: The Roaring Twenties (1939) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-02-23T19:50:00.000-08:00

Cagney, Bogart and bootlegging...what else need I say? Another period piece, designed to capture the spirit and essence of a certain era, similar to "Radio Days." However, the retrospective is a little less nostalgic that Allen's film or others of that ilk, which I mentioned in the review. The film seems intent on recreating many of the important historical events of the decade, but that dedication, while appreciated (speaking as one who has a penchant for the era), also distances it from emotion a bit more.

Centered around a WWI vet named Eddie Bartlett who becomes a prime time bootlegger(James Cagney), we get our proper tastes of the grand times that prohibition brought for the mob, tommyguns and all, as well as the cruelty of the stock market crash. Bartlett starts out as a lowly cab driver, struggling to make ends meet, but then he meets a dark dame with a hand in the underworld (the always welcome Gladys George) and after pairing up with a fellow former soldier (Bogart), teh booze and bullets flow like there's no tomorrow. The narrative disassociates the viewer from the primary characters a bit as I mentioned, but on the whole, considering the principle leads involved, it's hard for it to not hold your interest.

Watch the Trailer

Day 332: Radio Days (1987) - Rank 4/5

2010-02-21T14:08:00.000-08:00

A nice little slice of nostalgia compliments of Woody Allen. The film is absent of both his zany rigmarole that is guides films like "Sleeper" or "Love and Death," as well as the self-deprecation or angst that works its way into many of his films, from "Annie Hall" to "Crimes and Misdemeanors." "Radio Days" plays out like a series of vignettes, changing as often as, appropriately enough, the programming on a radio station. Allen is never present in his film, but he serves as the narrator. As he reminisces about his youth, we're treated to a series of anecdotes that helped shape who he became. The central force tying all of these stories together (and quite often instigating them) is the radio. From his family playing along with "Guess that Tune" to an interrupted first date as a result of Orson Welles' "War of the Worlds" broadcast, the gossip, shows and songs of the radio influence all around him.

A pleasant aspect to the film is it's lack of any message, save perhaps a mild theme about how we are products of our environments. No social commentary on introversion, infidelity or inadequacy - just fun. To put it simply, of all of Woody's films, this by far feels like his most honest and heartfelt piece, and naturally so, for we're watching his childhood. It's akin to George Lucas' "American Graffiti" or Richard Linkletter's "Dazed and Confused." They're taking advantage of the medium they work in to share their youth with us. Some might view that as egocentric, but I love these films because you're absolutely immersed in a time and culture long gone. The costumes, the music, the morals...they're all there, and the screen is so saturated with the sentiment of an auteur that it's hard to not wax nostalgic about your own childhood upon leaving the cinema.

Watch the Trailer

Day 331: Long Weekend (1978) - Rank 4.5/5

2010-02-21T12:55:00.000-08:00

This is yet another film I wish I had seen when I was younger - and not because it's a children's film. "Long Weekend," if it could be categorized, would best fall into the "animal attack" genre. I've long been a fan of such films and that fandom was sparked by "Day of the Animals." I first saw William Girdler's macabre commentary on the problem of depleting ozone levels during "Super Scary Saturday" on TBS (a venue for drive-in B-movies from the 1960's and 1970's, hosted by Al Lewis in Grandpa Munster guise). While most kids would be traumatized by an R-rated depiction of a group of campers being attacked by everything int eh woods, save the kitchen sink, I totally dug it. Colin Eggleston's "Long Weekend" goes a step further - he throws in the kitchen sink.

Not only are opossums and hawks the creatures antagonizing a vacationing couple, but even the very trees seem to be striking out. The organisms never move as Enths do, but branches falls off at coincidental moments. On the surface, the film seems a clear-cut "nature takes its revenge" storyline. Peter and Marcia spray insecticides around their camping area, plow through the underbrush in their four-wheeler, shoot a duogong for shits and giggles, etc. and the assault is justice on the part of the forest. However, below that, there are a lot of strange elements that seem almost contrary to that simple plot. There's a crossbow that fires by an unseen hand, the cries of the duogong continue after its death until its body appears on the edge of the camp, a submerged bus with the corpse of a young woman rests a quarter mile from the shore. These items are never explained, nor are they explored, sowing a sense of distrust between the audience and the film. Is there something going on beyond the forest striking back that the victims and the viewers cannot comprehend, or are the campers simply going mad? This pushes the film more into the realm of "Polanski thriller" than mere B-horror. An arthouse animal attack film, is you will.

Watch the Trailer

Day 330: Salome's Last Dance (1988) - Rank 4/5

2010-02-21T12:22:00.000-08:00

Within the first five minutes of the film, there's no doubt you're watching a Ken Russell film. From the outlandish characters to the elaborate sets, the viewer is treated to a saturation of excess and Wilde. Set in the late 19th century, Oscar Wilde (Nickolas Grace) and his lover, Lord Douglas, visit an opulent brothel in high London. The two are treated to a play that has been arranged by the brothel's owner, Alfred (Stratford Johns). The piece? "Salome's Last Dance" written by Oscar Wilde. Wilde is then treated to an adaptation of his play where the parts are played by the establishment's prostitutes. Wilde enjoys the production and other activities throughout.

Not one of Russell's strongest, but not his weakest either. It could best be described as "eye candy" (an apropos description considering Glenda Jackson is playing the titular Salome). The visuals are positively striking and the performances delightfully campy. However, apart from the basic description provided above, there's not much substance to it. It seems that it's merely an exercise in fun, and possibly self-gratification, for the director. But considering that directors like Quentin Tarantino have a resume of films that are nothing but cinematic masturbation, so to speak, then I suppose all directors are permitted such pieces now and again. One final note: if there was ever a character actor destined to play my friend Robert Boston in a film, it would easily be Stratford Johns.

Watch the Trailer

Day 329: A Face in the Crowd (1957) - Rank 5/5

2010-02-21T11:20:00.000-08:00

While "The Giant Claw" was "terrorizing" folks on theater screens in 1957, other screens were offering up a different monster - Lonsesome Rhodes. Lonesome was not a giant bird from an antimatter universe, but a hopeless drunk who stumbles into the big time. The character of Lonesome is analogous to characters like Daniel Plainview - a sociopath with power that you find yourself strangely enjoying and, at times, rooting for. Played by Andy Griffith with iniquitous zeal, Lonesome Rhodes is a chimera of society's ugliest aspects.

Plucked from a drunk tank in a backwoods town by a local radio show hostess (Patricia Neal), Lonesome shares his homespun wisdom and a song with his sheepish drawl across the airwaves. Before he knows it, he has a sponsor, then two. His ascension into the nation's public eye enables him to dabble in everything from corporate bureaucracies to politics, and each new realm Lonesome stretches into enhances his greed and power hungry nature all the more. The story of a down-on-his-luck artist catching the break of a lifetime and making it big is a staple of Hollywood, and the corruption of the soul by power is typically the cliched angle the scripts take. But director Elia Kazan never tries to convince you that Lonesome is a good-tempered rube who falls into wrong - Lonesome is the same, self-centered rogue that spent every weekend in the drunk tank; however, he now has influence and wealth to heighten his ego and vices. How Andy Griffith failed to receive any award recognition for his powerhouse performance is beyond my ken (especially since this was his debut on film). My only hypothesis is that he was too new to Hollywood at the time. Had he shown his darker side after becoming a household name as Sheriff Taylor, he might have turned more heads, though it's also likely that at that stage, he would have never been considered for the role in the first place.

Watch the Trailer

Day 328: The Giant Claw (1957) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-02-21T09:09:00.000-08:00

From the dark recesses of my childhood, one wrought with many a Saturday afternoon spent watching cheesy horror films, comes "The Giant Claw." It's hard to believe that as a kid, this movie creeped the shit out of me. Why? It's was that damned bird marionette. That puppet looks like how the devil might have appeared to Jim Henson had he a Hunter S. Thompson lifestyle. I still recollect the lazy summer evenings where I would suspiciously eye the dusk sky, waiting for that damned bird to swoop down and eat me, emitting it's vicious laugh (the sound of the bird's cry actually sounds like the orgasm of a harp seal reversed with a lot of reverb). To look at the thing now and imagine that it was once terrifying sounds laughable.

But other creatures that haunted my dreams from my childhood, like G'Mork from "The Neverending Story"

Lord Kuruku from "Unico on the Island of Magic"

and not included is the sketch drawing John Lithgow does of bigfoot in "Harry and the Hendersons."

The film is as insipid as the monster itself, but it's so laughably absurd, it's actually fun. The bird flies in a predictable spiral pattern, branching ever outward from the point where it entered our world. Where did it come from? The scientists explain that during an atomic test during a top secret radar experiment a dimensional door was opened to an antimatter universe and this bird, from 17,000 B.C. on the parallel Earth came forward in time to our world. Simple enough. I talk about that shit happening in my science class all the time. Pretty common really. Where do you think "The Bozo Show's" Wizzo the Wizard came from? (speaking of terrifying characters from my childhood...)

Watch the Trailer...or just this.

Day 327: Q (1982) - Rank 2.5/5

2010-02-21T08:36:00.000-08:00

Okay, despite living sans home computer for three months now, I need to finish my year's reviews. I started reviewing at the end of February of last year, so I suppose if I complete the process within the next week, the delay won't be too admonishable (watch me not finish until April now). I snagged "Q" simply because it was a movie with the title "Q." Like "M," a single letter title piques interest. Unlike "M," "Q" does not hold interest that well. Another brain child of Larry Cohen, the mastermind behind "It's Alive," "Q" is another monster flick that features a mythical bird rather than a mutated child. The delightfully cheesy poster tagline says it all: "Its name is Quetzalcoatl... just call it Q, that's all you'll have time to say before it tears you apart!"

The serpent/bird attacks are the nonsense that bring two parallel story lines into the same fold. On one side of the city, Detective Shepherd (David Carradine) is investigating a series of murders where each victim is found skinned from head to toe. On the other side of town, small-time crook Jimmy Quinn (Michael Moriarty) is running from the cops after a jewel heist gone sour and ends up at the top of the Chrysler Building where Q has its nest. Jimmy tries to extort the city for profit in exchange for knowing the bird's lair, Shepherd comes to realize that the museum's expert on Aztec monsters is the guy who brought the creature to life, Carradine and costar Richard Roundtree wander around bored for a bit and the finale to King Kong is redone. Entertaining schlock at points I suppose, but the film does disprove my friend Bryan's theory that "any film that features boobs and decapitation in the first ten minutes is awesome!"

Watch the Trailer

Day 326: Black Narcissus (1947) - Rank 5/5

2010-02-09T16:50:00.000-08:00

I...love...Technicolor. "Black Narcissus" splashes the screen with all the colors of the East in a manner so marvelous, it gives recent explorations in teh region, such as "Monsoon Wedding" or "Vanity Fair" or...um..."Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom" a damn good run for their money. To label a story about a group of nuns a Technicolor spectacle almost seems contradictory, for black and white scarcely necessitate the film medium. But the stark white of the habits create excellent juxtapositions with the rosy hue of Deborah Kerr's cheeks, to say nothing of the monochromatic dresses of the nuns pitted against the multi-hued royal palace where they settle down.

The tale seems a paltry one at first - a band of nuns open up a new mission and must battle the elements as they win the people's hearts. The location is delightfully exotic - the palace of Mopu, set high in the Himilayas just off the beaten path from Darjeeling, India. But the picturesque setting holds an unseen power - one that draws out the insecuritues of the sisters. Sister Ruth's sexual desires run mad, mixed with a dash of hypocondria and mental instability. Sister Philippa plants flowers rather than vegetables, reasoning that something about the beauty of the place betrayed her logic. Even Sister Clodagh (Kerr) experiences a similar sexual frustration to the others, brought about by reoccurring memories of an unrequited love, the presence of the "charming" Mr. Dean (David Farrar) and the erotic perfume of the local young general(Sabu) - the infamous Black Narcissus.

The complexities behind the fragment psyches of the nuns draws you in, much as the nuns are drawn to the brooding and mysterious atmosphere of the palace. There are many moments that are positively chilling, such as the scene where Clodagh walks into Sister Ruth's room and finds her in a civilian's dress with lipstick as red as blood. The nun, fallen prey to her own madness and temptation, is a far scarier creature than those conjured up by the likes of Jack Pierce. As Ruth continues to apply makeup, Clodagh begins reading scripture, a duel of wits that's absolutely masterful. Perfectly executed and deep in structure and message, "Black Narcissus" rivals "Mother Joan of the Angels" "The Devils" and "Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit" where dark stories about nuns are concerned. Yes, I know I'm bad...

Watch the Trailer

Day 325: Walkabout (1971) - Rank 4/5

2010-02-09T16:19:00.000-08:00

"Walkabout" is a dark and terse coming-of-age story in the wilds of the Australian outback. The film derives its title from the Aboriginal rite of passage ceremony where the young males of the tribe disappear into the wilderness and survive off of the land, only to return some time later as “a man.” That individual is played by one of the most distinctive Aboriginal character actors in pictures, David Gulpilil (an excellent, first performance). During his excursion across the Australian desert, he happens across two young children, Girl and Boy, whose father killed himself and left them to rot in the wilderness. Hindered by the language barrier, Girl makes it clear that she and her brother wish to return to “civilization,” and together, the three set off on their journey.

While the basic setup may seem prime fodder for a Disney live-action film, the finished product is anything but in the hands of Nicolas Roeg. Roeg pits the travelers against themes of sexual frustration and coping along with the sun and venomous wildlife. The juxtaposition of colonial civilization with Aboriginal mysticism is as present here as it is in some of Peter Weir’s earlier works (blatantly presented at times, as we see Girl lugging a transistor radio through the desert, tuned to a station that spouts out etiquette advice 24/7). But the film differs from Weir’s works, because the heart of the film is not a mystery, but rather, a tale about the dissolution of youth and the premature acceptance of responsibility. Roeg uses the backdrop of Australia’s outback so beautifully, the entire film often feels like William Blake’s “Songs of Innocence and Experience” sent wonderfully into motion.

Watch the Trailer

Day 324: Star Trek (2009) - Rank 5/5

2010-02-09T16:14:00.000-08:00

Posting a review on this film detailing the outlines of the plot would be rather moot, for it seems that I was one of the few individuals who waited so long to see it. I have nothing against Star Trek – in fact, far from it. My Saturday evenings were spent watching The Next Generation with my father (typically, I served as an altar boy on Saturday night mass, so my father had to speed like a madman to get home in time for the show. Many a night I tuned out the rote ceremony with ponderings over what the Enterprise would encounter next. But I digress…). I can also pepper any serious conversation with dozens of “Star Trek VI” quotes with relative ease.

Therefore, my delay in seeing the film was not due to disinterest. Instead, I was working three jobs at the time of its release, mixed with my duties for Wonderfest, end of the school year, trip to the Grand Canyon, blah, blah, blah, [insert pithy excuse here]. As a result, I greatly regret not seeing the film on the big screen, because it’s one hell of a time (perhaps Mr. Spock’s time traveling device would come in handy here, though I have to ask: “Red matter?”). While the storyline might be heavily convoluted for an origin story (again, “Red matter?”), it still entertains by presenting a wet-behind-the-ears crew that wipes away the memories of the former cast’s snarkiness at the end of their careers and replaces it with wild action executed with wild abandon. The reckless and eager nature of Chris Pine compliments the persona of Captain Kirk perfectly, and (Karl Urban channels DeForest Kelly to a “t.” In fact, the reimagining is an exercise in perfect casting (though Simon Pegg does get a bit irritating in quirky mode as Mr. Scott), so it’s easy to see why so many fans were accepting of the film. Thanks, J.J.

Watch the Trailer

Day 323: Patrick (1978) - Rank 4/5

2010-02-09T15:58:00.000-08:00

Low budget and gimmicky, but still entertaining fare. The film opens up similarly to John Carpenter's "Halloween," with a brutal POV murder of a happy couple in a bathtub - the only back story we get for Patrick (note: while both film openings are remarkably similar to one another, "Patrick" neither filmmaker could have been aware of the other's film until much later due to delayed, overseas release dates). Years later, Patrick is in a comatose state in an insane asylum. Enter Kathy, a naive nurse whom Patrick takes a liking to. At first his gestures are as simple as reflexive spits or the occasional erection, but soon his telekinetic powers are writing prose on Kathy's typewriter and tearing her home asunder when Kathy's eye turns to another man.

Pure drive-in cinema with a "Twilight Zone" air, but the film does generate genuine suspense. There's also a fair deal of dark humor peppered throughout the storyline. Robert Helpmann also stars as the sadistic head of surgery at the hospital - a man who is reduced to eating frog's innards by the end of the film. While the film is, by no means, perfect, for its pacing is rather labored at times, it does function well as a "gateway film" for inducing the desire to watch more Aussie horror flicks.

Watch the Trailer

Day 322: MST3K: Santa Claus (1959) - Rank 5/5

2010-02-06T12:48:00.000-08:00

From “Return to Oz” to “The Neverending Story,” I had ample nightmare material to fuel my childhood mind. Still, “Santa Claus” takes the cake when it comes to disturbing children’s films. It also presents Santa’s workshop and his personal plight in a manner far more bizarre than “Santa Claus: the Movie.” Yes, while the 1985 box office failure had a semi-sober Dudley Moore in tights, John Lithgow flying through the air while madly chomping candy canes and more product placement than you could shake a stick at, “Santa Claus” has child enslavement and the devil.

A devil by the name of Pitch is the main foil for Kris Kringle, and he does his best to taint the consciences of Mexican children everywhere. His goal is to destroy the Christmas spirit…or something. Santa has a workshop devoid of elves, but populated by children dressed in full stereotypical attire, from Spanish children in sombreros to Cuban children in guerrilla fatigues, guns in hand – I shit you not. There’s also a talking orifice that looks like Santa’s personal pleasure hole. It’s function seems rather vague. There’s also maniacally-laughing reindeer – a sight that would be more appropriate in an “Evil Dead” film and not a Christmas story. If you fear that Santa might not defeat the devil, then clearly you’re unfamiliar with the format of Christmas films. If you fear that you might suffer weird, fever dreams after watching this, you’re probably right. As for the MST3K crew, this is one of those episodes that’s a perfect hit. A somewhat entertaining B-movie mixed with a fantastic series of rejoinders makes this a holiday season must-see.

Watch the Trailer

Day 321: The Baron of Arizona (1950) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-24T12:03:00.000-08:00

A very by-the-books biopic on one of the country's greatest con men. The film features an early pairing of two eclectic members of Hollywood - Vincent Price, prior to becoming a horror icon, and director Samuel Fuller (on his second feature length film). Price is James Reavis, a man who would make himself "Baron of Arizona" only through patiently acting out a twenty year scheme that will entitle the state to his name. He does so by adopting an orphan and having her schooled in the ways of Spanish aristocracy. While she grows old, he poses as everything from a monk to a gypsy so he can forge the proper documents to make it seem as if the land belongs to a family of Spanish nobles, whose only surviving relative is the young girl. And when she's old enough, he marries her so he can take over the state, which is a little creepy when you think about it...

Price executes the role with smarmy finesse, as he worms his way into the trust of one organization to the next, taking years to do so at times. As for the direction, well...it's hailed as a long lost Fuller classic, and the "long lost" portion may be accurate; however, the sense of direction is very conventional and it bears none of the earmarks that make it characteristically Fuller's (or anyone else's for that matter). And while the story is interesting, it never soars to the epic proportions its capable of.

Day 320: Always Leave Them Laughing (1949) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-24T11:22:00.000-08:00

This tale of a comedian's struggle to make it to the top feels a little played at times, but what saves the story from being formulaic drivel is the brilliance of Milton Berle. This film was the perfect vehicle for the comedian to show his stuff, and while he was well-known prior, this seems to be the role that shot him to the household name status. As Kip Cooper, Berle has ample opportunities to not only lampoon himself, but also pay homage to countless comedians before him. Cooper is hackneyed, boorish and at many points, unoriginal. He tries to make a star of himself by taking on the stylings of others in the profession.

I found it entertaining to watch Berle tackle famous bits, like Al Jolson's "Mammy" or belt out a Cole Porter tune, as he moves from one vaudevillian act to the next in the hopes that he will strike it hot with audiences. There's something endearing about Cooper's desperation, but the darker elements to his soul as he walks over his friends and lovers alike to reach the top also fit Berle's personality as well. Ruth Roman and Bert Lahr are also fun supporting cast members, but this is definitely Berle's opportunity to shine.

Day 319: Sweet Smell of Success (1957) - Rank 4.5/5

2010-01-24T11:02:00.000-08:00

Film noir is a genre filled with predictable conventions, from convoluted plots to anti-hero protagonists. Snappy, slang-ridden dialog is another staple and when it comes to "Sweet Smell of Success," the repartee can't be outdone. Not unlike "A Clockwork Orange," the script is interlaced with its own breed of the English language. Expressions like, "I often wish I were dead and wore a hearing aid. With a simple flick of a switch, I could shut out the greedy murmur of little men." spew forth from the mouth of gossip columnist extraordinaire J.J. Hunsecker (played with calculating menace by Burt Lancaster). Many of his remarks are rejoinders to comments made by his fawning toadie, Sidney Falco (Tony Curtis - a perfect yang to Lancaster's yin), a press agent who suckles at J.J.'s teat in the hopes that the writer might throw one of his clients a bone.

Starved and desperate for a plug for one of his clients, Falco agrees to help J.J. destroy the romance between J.J.'s kid sister, Susan and a reefer-smoking band man named Dallas (Martin Milner). Trouble is, everything from the law to Sidney's conscience get in the way of his carrying out the dirty deed and soon, it looks like he might end up the patsy for a scandal rather than placating the man whose words level cities. Traveling to a rhythm all its own, "Sweet Smell of Success" blows along like an out-of-control El Train, but I'll be damned if it doesn't capture the seedy underbelly of show business and popularity better than so many pretenders.

Watch the Trailer

Day 318: Slugs (1953) - Rank 4.5/5...or 1/5

2010-01-24T09:30:00.000-08:00

Please be warned. My high rating of the film could also be translated into a very low rating, for the film is one of the worst films I've ever seen. However, unlike "Manos: Hands of Fate," "Red Zone Cuba," "Teenagers from Outer Space" or a dozen other flicks introduced to a wider audience by Mystery Science Theater 3000, the film is a funny watch alone. Even Tommy Wiseau's "The Room" has laughable moments, but the film is practically unbearable when watching it alone. In fact, most bad films demand group settings and ample libations, but "Slugs" is one of those few exceptions. There were numerous parts where I guffawed over the jilted dialog as a result of a preposterous visual or stale line.

What's the premise? It's that slugs have developed a taste for human flesh and they attack a town. There is not a single element about this film that is intentionally campy or tongue-in-cheek. The epic is played out as serious as serious-can-be (which isn't much, considering the storyline). You will see teenage girls have their tits devoured by a tidal wave of gastropods, a businessman's eyes explode with a gusher of nematodes, slug puppets with teeth and a "cutting edge" research laboratory with safety signs posted in the background that clearly I.D. the room as a high school classroom. The sad thing is the film was based on a book (which I must pick up). Neither the film's gore nor absurdity can be understated. In fact, as of this moment, I am officially declaring that "Slugs" shall be the first film to premiere at my drive-in this season. Seriously, the mind reels...just check the awesome trailer.

Watch the Trailer

Day 317: Stargate (1994 ) - Rank 3/5

2010-01-17T12:29:00.000-08:00

My general impression of the film can best be summed up by a moment that occurred between myself and "Stargate" about halfway in. After the American military has entered Egypt-land, they are treated to a banquet by Erick Avari and his Avarians. A strange, roasted creature, which looks like a parasite that might have been passed by Jabba the Hutt, is laid before James Spader (who is more schtick than man in the film). Colonel Snake Plissken, I mean Colonel O'Neil (Kurt Russell) glances warily at the dish and makes a derisive remark. Dr. Jackson (Spader) samples it and chews, thoughtfully. He's then asked how it tastes. At this point, already a tad weary of Spader's rigmarole, said aloud to the television screen, "I swear to God, he's better not say, 'It's tastes like chicken.' "

"It tastes like chicken!"

"Mother fucker!!!"

It's not like I pictured anything overly original from a production with Roland Emmerich and Dean Devlin at the helm. Emmerich has an exploitative nature about his filmmaking which I can't help but tip my hat to. I see him as filling the niche that Irwin Allen left behind (the role of a director that makes disaster films starring a collection of Hollywood names all for the sake of dough-ray-me). And Devlin falls more in line with Bert I. Gordon, because the two have a passion for big creatures. But watching this first collaboration between the two left me feeling a little disappointed. I can attribute my sense of emptiness to three possible reasons.

1. It was their first collaboration, ergo, they were "playing it safe." The film is terribly formulaic, but unlike the formulaic "Independence Day," that formula isn't pushed to the very limits of logic. "Stargate" is simply a modest action film, made before the era where Emmerich learned that "blowing up the whole, goddamned world" = "awesome as shit." I watched it expecting outlandish (though spaceship pyramids are a tad excessive), but was treated to a small battle in an isolated desert. An analogy I can draw is: imagine how subdued "Star Wars" would have seemed if it had been concentrated only at Mos Eisley instead of across an entire galaxy (actually, you don't have to imagine too hard. It's called "Phantom Menace").

2. I want James Spader to die. Sure, the expert, controversial scientist, whose life works are readily dismissed as "Poppycock" by his peers, saving the day is tried and true as Jeff Goldblum and Dennis Quaid would demonstrate in later Emmerich films with tongue-in-cheek glee. But Dr. Daniels is a little too good, solving problems in a matter of hours that teams of scientists have been pondering for years. He has allergies too, so if you find a character sneezing at the most inopportune times, you'll love his character. They could have casted somebody, anybody, in place of Spader and I would have been happier. Jesus, even French Stewart was tolerable next to Spader (and the casting of Stewart worked out pretty well, for since most shots were in the sun-scorched desert, it gave the obnoxious character actor a reason to be squinting all the time).

3. I didn't see this film as a teenager. Emmerich's schlock is designed for the juvenile mind. I think my love for "Independence Day" is largely due to the fact that I caught it when I was fifteen (and that movie was, for lack of a better word, the shit that summer). Sadly, I was into Egyptology in my younger adolescent years, so this would have struck me just right. But seeing it after knowing how delightfully outlandish Emmerich can be, it just seems very subdued on the whole.

But make no mistake, I really do hate James Spader...

Watch the Trailer

Day 316: Dangerous Crossing (1953) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-17T08:58:00.000-08:00

A fun little exercise in atmosphere and paranoia. Ruth Bowman and her new husband are both off on a trans-Atlantic cruise. Ruth separates with her husband and badda-boom, he's gone. There's no trace of his luggage and no member of the crew can recall seeing Ruth with anyone. As Ruth begins to question her sanity, she comes under the wing of ship's doctor, Dr. Manning (Michael Rennie). Ruth is bound and determined to prove that her husband really exists and is trapped somewhere on the ship, but the rest of the crew views her as a lunatic and a nuisance, save Dr. Manning who seems to believe her.

This is a story that has been done many times before and since. The most recent permutations I can recall are "The Forgotten" and "Flightplan." Just as is the case with such films, you find yourself questioning the logic of the situation a hell of a lot, because some individuals clearly had conversations with Ruth's husband, but they claim to draw a blank when it comes to events that took place an hour ago. My only guess is that during cruises to the Caribbean and just floating around in international waters in general, drug use is a little looser with the crew, hence chronic short-term memory loss. Thus leads me to a fun film idea that just sprang to mind - a film noir parody of a storyline similar to this where the ultimate cause of all the mystery is not an elaborate scheme, but merely the fault of heavy pot use. However, upon writing that, I realize that I just described the plot to "Dude, Where's My Car?" So logic dictates that stoner comedies evolved from film noir? I just confused myself to the point that I can't remember who I last talked to now, so I'll stop while I'm behind. One item worth mentioning: I could listen to Michael Rennie read the dictionary, despite how emasculating such an admission sounds. Okay, this review's a mess. I'm stopping now.

Watch the Trailer

Day 315: The Queen (2006 ) - Rank 4/5

2010-01-16T12:00:00.000-08:00

Stephen Frears is a wonderfully versatile director whose films range from the comic ("Mrs. Henderson Presents," "High Fidelity") to the positively dark ("Dirty Pretty Things"). In this venture, he takes a more objective, though poignant, look at a pivotal moment in a nation's history, not unlike Ron Howard's "Frost/Nixon." The moment he centers on is the death of Princess Diana, but rather than focus on recreating the accident and trying to lay blame, the grief that came in the wake of the activist's demise is at the heart of the film, with an examination of Queen Elizabeth II in particular (natch).

Helen Mirren is positively uncanny as Queen Elizabeth II, her Oscar more than earned. Her portrayal reflects the difficult decisions that the matriarch was faced with after Diana's death. Granted, whether it was necessary for her to address the death or not was an issue, but it was merely the tip of the iceberg. Her main obstacle is the shift of the English people to more modern outlooks to life while she stands by the tried and true attitudes of the monarchy, only to find that such a path alienates her from her people to the point that they see her as villainous as the paparazzi photographers responsible for the accident. The film would actually act as a decent companion piece with "The Life and Times of Colonel Blimp," for both have a similar theme and tone. Each is centered around a character whose principals reflect the British ideals and principles long held over generations. However, the resolution is very different, for where "Colonel Blimp" encourages audience members to embrace British traditions of chivalry, reserve and other "respectable behaviors," "The Queen" makes more of a push for the need to adapt the old to the new, rather than dogmatically holding on to the past.

Watch the Trailer

Day 314: The Mummy (1959 ) - Rank 3/5

2010-01-16T11:45:00.000-08:00

While Hammer Film Studios was in the throes of rebooting the classic monster franchises abandoned by Universal studios, they decided to include "The Mummy" in their repertoire. But unlike the new take on vampires, werewolves or Frankenstein's monster, the rejuvenation of mummies left me wanting. The formula didn't change much for this film when compared with "Curse of Frankenstein" or "Horror of Dracula." You still have Peter Cushing as a protagonist fighting Christopher Lee as the monster under the watchful direction of Terence Fisher. But where the pacing of the other films seemed deliberate and methodical in its restrained momentum, "The Mummy" drags to the point that it lends to comparisons with the rigor mortis movements of its titular creature.

The premise for this venture is a unique take on the legend, focused still on revenge beyond the grave, but the use of the mummy is more akin to the sequels of the original Karloff mood piece and not the 1932 classic itself. A trio of archeologists uncover a tomb and one foolishly reads the scroll of life, resurrecting Ardeth Bay (Lee) and sending the reader into a state of shock. He's brought back to England and shotly thereafter, he and one of the others in the original three are murdered by Ardeth Bay. That leaves only archeologist John Banning (Cushing) to battle the undead creature. As I mentioned before, the pacing was slow to the point that it had a somnambular effect on my viewing. I suppose it would be unfair to deliver a true criticism of a film I was dozing in and out of, but I will put it that my review is probably more generous than it should be considering the fact that it was so difficult to stay aroused through.

Watch the Trailer

Day 313: High Noon (1952 ) - Rank 4.5/5

2010-01-16T11:29:00.000-08:00

I've seen this film once before, but it's probably been close to a decade since I last watched it, so save the general premise and the resolution, much of it had been long forgotten by me. I selected it as an entry with my film club at school, because it led us to a post-film discussion regarding real-time editing. Upon rewatching the film, I was surprised with the degree of tension that Fred Zinnemann manages to maintain throughout a solid eighty minutes. For those unfamiliar with the premise, the film begins at twenty minutes until eleven on the morning that Marshal Will Kane (Gary Cooper) is lying down his badge and taking a new wife. As the wedding ceremony ends, he learns that gunman Frank Miller has been released from prison and is headed to town on the noon train with revenge in mind. Over the next hour, the camera follows Kane as he struggles to find someone, anyone, who will help him defend the town he fought so hard to bring peace to.

The plight of Cooper's Kane is positively heart-wrenching. Despite all he's done for the benefit of the town and its peoples, no one has the gumption to stand by his side, falling prey to cowardice or petty dismissal instead. The overall resolution of all the townsfolk is that it would be best if Kane fled and let Miller seize control over the town once more. The ticking clock motif makes Kane's struggle all the more frantic, yet the veteran marshal never speeds up his stride. It's easy to see how this became the iconic role that many remember Cooper for.

One delightful element I'd forgotten was the bevy of character actors that are utilized in the film. Harry Morgan, Thomas Mitchell and Lon Chaney Jr. play just a few of the let-downs that Kane comes to grips with. Lloyd Bridges excels as Kane's selfish and headstrong deputy and Grace Kelly lights up the screen as his new bride. My one and only criticism is I found the repetition of Tex Ritter's "Do Not Forsake Me, O My Darlin'" a little trying after the first half hour, but otherwise, a solid film that set a new standard for both Westerns as well as film editing.

Watch the Trailer

Day 312: The Box (2009 ) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-16T11:01:00.000-08:00

To say that I found "The Box" to be a good film, much less a coherent one, would be a lie on my part. But there's something about Richard Kelly's third feature film that I found entertaining. It's the same sense of entertainment I derive from watching a film like "Toys." The story is a mess and I'm never quite sure exactly what's taking place, but it's so absurd that I feel I'm hypnotized by the screen. The general premise of the film is mystery man Arlington Stewart (Frank Langella delightfully hamming up the role) delivers a box to the Lewis couple (James Marsden and Cameron Diaz), which possesses a button that, if punched, will reward them with a million dollars. The catch is that someone, somewhere, will die. Norma pushes it, unleashing a veritable Pandora's box of consequences and incidents, jolting reanimated corpses, alien portals and coincidental circumstances more convoluted and implausible than those in "The Game."

At the end of the film, I felt myself filled with the same sense of confusion I had after watching "Mulholland Drive" for the first time. However, the difference was that the confusion was not accompanied by a sense of betrayal. I don't feel like Kelly was trying to bullshit me with a "If you don't get this, then watch it again" mentality. instead, I feel like he just bit off more than he could chew, so to speak. The film projects a genuine attempt to entertain rather than explain and as a result, I found myself chuckling at some of the plots absurdities rather than scratching my head at them. That amusement was not the same as what I would experience while watching an Ed Wood film or something equally as hokey. Rather, I felt as if there were just elements of "The Box" that Kelly orchestrated "for weird's sake" (the library scene is a perfect example, for those who have seen it and know of what I speak) and he was just hoping someone would appreciate them from that point of view. And yes, I did.

Watch the Trailer

Day 311: I Wake Up Screaming (1941 ) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-16T10:39:00.000-08:00

Fox's first attempt at film noir (also released as "Hot Shot") is a satisfying venture into the genre, but it pales in comparison with some of its brethren. This is primarily due to its predictability. Granted, film noir plots do stick to a series of well-played conventions, but not all of them possess outcomes that are foreseeable fifteen minutes in. Victor Mature stars in one of his earlier leading man roles and generates a presence that demonstrates why he achieved a matinee idol status, just as Robert Mitchum did in "Out of the Past" (though it doesn't rival Mature's tortured performance in "Kiss of Death"). He's a promoter who takes on a waitress as a client on a dare and soon finds himself the target of a merciless police department when she mysteriously turns up dead.

The moment that Laird Cregar popped up in the credits, my spirits were buoyed, for I've enjoyed the few roles I've seen with the character actor, whose five year career was cut all to short by a heart attack. But as soon as Cregar strolls on as the detective on the case, the audience knows that he's the killer. You don't know how or when he did it, but there's no doubt in your mind that he knows more about the death than he lets on. Casting like that is about as logical as casting Rondo Hatton as the main suspect and then trying to convince the audience that he's innocent - it just ain't gonna work. It would have been more logical to use Cregar's corrupt detective as a red herring, but alas, the film progresses along a rather played (though still entertaining) path. Cool score, though.

Watch the Trailer

Day 310: Onibaba (1964 ) - Rank 5/5

2010-01-16T09:03:00.000-08:00

Dreamlike and carnal, "Onibaba" is a delightful tale of petty revenge and infidelity that plays out like an ancient Japanese parable. Set during fourteenth century feudal Japan, a mother and her daughter-in-law live in a small hut amidst a veritable sea of susuki grass (resembling an expanse of wheat to the degree that I found myself channeling Woody Allen from "Love and Death" on more than one occasion. "Fields of wheat, cream of wheat..."). They make a living by killing samurai and soldiers that become lost in the giant grass field, dumping their bodies in a tremendous pit and harvesting their weapons and armor for trade. When a neighbor returns from war, he recounts how the mother's son (and daughter-in-law's husband) was killed, a tale that points the finger of blame squarely on him. But it doesn't matter much to the young girl that this man is responsible for the slaying of her husband, because she's horny as shit. Soon, she's fleeing to his hut at night, like a dog in heat, for sex that makes Tyler Durden's "sport fucking" in "Fight Club" seem tepid. Problem is, the mother is far more vengeful and when she manages to kill a samurai and steal his oni demon mask, she uses it to dress as a ghost and scare her daughter-in-law away from her sexual escapades.

While it's difficult to explain why the film is so delightfully macabre, for that would involve detailing the dark and darker twists the story takes as it progresses, take my work for it that this is one of the most enjoyable exercises in vengeful scheming I've seen in cinema. The night shots are particularly haunting, with high contrast exaggerating every curve and shadow of the demon mask to chilling proportions. The cold winds perpetually blowing through the grasses brought the surroundings alive, adding to the eerie atmosphere. The score heightens the surreal settings and frenzied emotions through a mix of manic drum beats, howling gales and birds squawking. There are just so many elements working together to make this both a beautiful and spectral film.

Watch the Trailer

Day 309: Four Flies on Grey Velvet (1971) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-10T12:25:00.000-08:00

This was long considered one of Dario Argento's "lost works" due to limited availability. When it was finally released in 2009, I looked forward to catching the early work by the Italian gore auteur. Sadly, I suppose it could be said that the film was lost for a reason - it's not the director's best. Argento films are trademarked by their surreal visuals and their bizarre (and sometimes near implausible) death scenes. The story often feels incidental, but if the script syncs up well with the body count, the films work really well. If not, they come off as rather sloppy, and I would say that this film falls into the latter category.

Our staple American actor is Michael Brandon. If you find yourself asking "Who?" you're not alone. A quick search of his Imdb resume yields no other titles of his that I'm familiar with. To be blunt, his performance as Roberto, the rock star, is not as indispensable as the performances of other Argento alum, like David Hemmings, Karl Malden or Jessica Harper. Anyway, Roberto finds himself being persistently trailed by a stalker for days and when he confronts the man, he's put in a position where he's forced to kill the man. He looks up after stabbing the sorry sot and witnesses a mysterious individual in a creepy mask photographing him. From here the blackmail, cat-and-mouse hijinks that are characteristic of many giallo films ensues, with the predictable domino effect of characters dying the millisecond they figure out the plot. I'm not sure how they manage to do it either, because when the murderer's identity is revealed at the end, it's the most patently absurd conclusion the film could have reached. It's still mindless fun for Argento fans, but unlike it's brethren in Argento's animal/giallo trilogy ("The Bird with the Crystal Plumage" and "Cat O' Nine Tails") is wouldn't fall into my top five (which would be rounded out by "Suspiria," "Deep Red," and "Opera"). One final note - I want one of these masks...

Watch the Trailer

Day 308: Enduring Love (2004) - Rank 4/5

2010-01-10T12:01:00.000-08:00

The best way to describe this film is it's excellent on all counts, from screenplay to acting and directing, but it is not something I would regularly watch for shits and giggles. The primary reason is that the film accomplishes, all too well, what it sets out to do - make the viewer feel uncomfortable. The tale of obsession is sparked by a chance collision of individuals through a tragic hot air balloon accident (possibly one of the most unique ways to set a plot in motion that I can recall). Two of the men at the scene are Joe (Daniel Craig) and Jed (Rhys Ifans). They are the first to discover the disemboweled body of the accident victim and during the pause of shock that first follows, Jed perceives there to be a "moment" between them. Jed then desperately (though that word puts it mildly) strives to convince Joe that there truly is something between them, despite Joe being positively repelled by the notion. As Jed's obsession and stalking persist, Joe is pushed to the edge at which point you're wondering who will remain standing at the end. But what Joe must consider is what he risks losing once he sinks to Jed's level...specifically, his fiancee Claire (Samantha Morton).

There are elements of the plot that could be likened to Adrian Lyne's "Fatal Attraction," though where the film's theme stops at "cautionary," "Enduring Love" delves deep into the horrific. What makes it unsettling is that Joe is just that - Average Joe. He didn't ask to end up in his predicament and when he becomes involved, there is no component to his choices that predetermines this fate for him, much less makes him deserving of it. It's merely a matter of chance and the film begs us to question ourselves as to how we would handle a similar situation, to ask: how would I react if someone pushed me past the limits of my sanity and threatened my life? It's a haunting piece of work that's hard to simply shrug off. Incidentally, Rhys Ifans is perfect for the role of Jed; I've wanted to kill that actor for years.

Watch the Trailer

Day 307: Never Cry Wolf (1983) - Rank 4/5

2010-01-10T11:36:00.000-08:00

"Never Cry Wolf" falls into that brief period of Disney history where the studio was endeavoring to shrug off the stereotype that it was only capable of lighter fare by descending into darker or more mature themes within its films (a push that ultimately led to the foundation of Touchstone). "The Black Hole" could easily be seen as the first step, though "Tron" and "The Black Cauldron" weren't "bring the little tykes" fare either. However, "Never Cry Wolf" differs in that there is nothing about it that smacks of Disney. There is no anthropomorphization of the wolves, no obligatory moments of cuteness to placate possible infants in the audience - it's just a straight docudrama on a biologist in the wild.

The film is certainly one of the better nature-oriented movies I've seen where the goal is neither to entertain audiences with animal antics nor inform as a straight-up documentary would. Instead, biologist Tyler is our principle and the audience follows him to the wilds of the Canadian Arctic as he goes to observe wolves in their natural habitat and deals with the difficulties of isolation. What sparked his mission was that the Canadian government was blaming the low numbers of caribou on the wolves, despite the fact that no scientist had ever seen wolves hunting in the wild (the film is based upon the memoirs of biologist Farley Mowat - the man who carried out this mission almost forty years earlier). Charles Martin Smith seems to undergo the same transformation through dedication that was seen in Emile Hirsch's performance in "Into the Wild." Brian Dennehy costars, but as is typically the case with Dennehy, he's playing Dennehy. Not to be scoffed is the cinematography of the Arctic landscape. There's a part of me that wishes I could have seen this flick on the big screen to appreciate the true scope of the film's backdrop. Despite a lot of positives, the film's message seems to pandering and preachy at times, and the fourth act feels far too abrupt. However, it cannot belittle the austere of the northern Canadian majesty and the touch of Aleutian mysticism that craftily works its way into the story.

Watch a Clip or Two

Day 306: Wise Blood (1979) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-10T11:13:00.000-08:00

This was a film that my departed friend Carl burned for me two years ago. Recalling that I still hadn't watched it after all this time, I popped it in, waxing back to the day he gave me a copy. He gave me a bootleg from his laserdisc, unprompted, after a discussion the two of us had had on character actors (as best as I recall, we'd been chatting about M. Emmet Walsh and Harry Dean Stanton). The film features Stanton in a pivotal role and was one of John Huston's last films. I remarked, "I take it that it's pretty good since you're giving me a copy," and he replied, "Well...it's different for Huston. Brad Dourif and Harry Stanton are a lot of fun. I don't know if I'd label it good, but it's definitely interesting."

Carl's opinion summed it up pretty well for me. Dourif, who has gone on to lend his talents to the likes of "Critters 4," "Exorcist III," "Seed of Chucky" and Rob Zombie's "Halloween II" truly shines here as Hazel Motes, a disillusioned war veteran who returns to his home town only to find it's practically a ghost town. The purchase of a new hat leads folks to assuming that he's a preacher, so he dons the role for a chance at making a buck and making something for himself. Equally as impressive is Harry Dean Stanton as the primary antagonist - a street preacher who's more con man than man of God. Motes hails his church as a church without Christ and attracts an eccentric little following, but soon his introspective nature gets the best of him and he becomes driven towards making himself seen more prophetic. You're never sure whether his change of mind comes from a genuine belief in what he preaches or it's merely a way of outdoing the showmanship of his rival, and that ambiguity lingers on your palette long after the credits have rolled. It's certainly not a film for everyone, but if you're a fan of Stanton or Dourif, it's well worth a watch because these are certainly two of the best roles of their careers.

Day 305: The Men Who Stare At Goats (2009) - Rank 3/5

2010-01-09T12:21:00.000-08:00

Ah, disappointment, thy name is "The Men Who Stare At Goats." I shouldn't be too surprised, for it happens semi-frequently for me. But I cannot deny that the trailer, as well as the films basic premise, had me pumped for an exercise is Clooney's trademark, wry humor mixed with a script that smacked of Charlie Kaufman. Instead, I found the film to be rather uneven. The basic premise is a Podunk newsman flies to Iraq to generate guilt with his adulterous wife and happens across a special forces operator who was once involved in secret army programs that trained troops to have psychic and telekinetic powers, as well as other rigmarole.

It's not that I found the film utterly terrible. It's just that I regarded it as a project with a tremendous amount of potential that turned out mediocre (an outcome that often vexes me more than if the story truly is tripe). Clooney seems to go through the motions of his "Jedi warrior" Lyn Cassidy, but all too often, I feel like he, along with Jeff Bridges and Kevin Spacey, are just being quirky for the sake of being quirky. As for Ewan McGregor's Ann Arbor reporter, let me just say this: "Ewan, I regard you as a great actor, though you make questionable choices from time to time. In this case, the most questionable choice was your decision to speak in an American accent that doesn't exist in the United States. Please avoid doing so again in the future."

The original material source was a book by the same name. While I've never read it, I've come to understand that it is not a narrative, nonfiction piece, but rather a collection of stories and facts regarding the avant-garde programs of the military. If that's the case, I can understand Peter Straughan's difficulty in adapting the source material into a somewhat linear tale. However, it can be done. I will cite "The Mothman Prophecies" as a prime example, for the majority of the movie is fictionalized and nowhere to be found int eh book, yet the script evokes the same, spine-tingling sensation that reading John Keel's novel does. I suppose that logic dictates that I should read "The Men Who Stare At Goats" before making the final verdict, for the film might also encapsulate the spirit of the text, but the film didn't exactly persuade me to carry out that venture.

Watch the Trailer

Day 304: The Wages of Fear (1953) - Rank 4.5/5

2010-01-09T11:54:00.000-08:00

I have friends who knock my penchant for French cinema, since the stereotype for the genre is romances or period dramas or...well, I have no idea what mindsets I'm up against, to tell you the truth. Whatever they may be, they cannot deny the badassery on display in Henri Georges Clouzot's tale of four men desperate to make some easy cash and possibly prove something to themselves along the way. Set in South America, the film centers around a motley lot of vagabonds, cons and other reprobates who have ended up at the armpit of the world and cannot seem to escape. They while away their days in the local cantina, dreaming of a better life outside the humid environment (think "Casablanca" with less Nazis and more sweat). In the pitiful economy of the town, airfare out seems impossible until the Southern Oil Company (SOC) has an outbreak of fires at one of its fields. They hire four men from the local rabble (the main focus on Mario, played by Yves Montand) to transport large containers of nitro glycerin across the treacherous jungle along winding, bumpy roads. The job promises almost certain death, but the pay is a small fortune to the men.

The majority of the film is the actual drive, and while the idea of the mission seems a little corny, Clouzot directs it with such sustained suspense that you truly do find yourself holding your breath at numerous stages. It's also a unique take on teh action film, where the antagonists are not a man in possession of a laser that could destroy the earth or some sort of monster; the true threats are a boulder blocking the road, a mile drive over wooden planks and a rickety platform. And at the risk of spoiling the film (disregard this, if you must), the resolution turns out far darker that I expected, to the point that I remarked "Really?" to the screen upon the film's completion. And while that might suggest to you that all four men are "blowed up" during the mission, I can assure you that there is a more macabre finale to the two-and-a-half hour epic that leaves you stunned.

Watch the Trailer

Day 303: Out of the Past (1987) - Rank 4/5

2010-01-05T19:01:00.000-08:00

Robert Mitchum stars in this dark and twisted tale about buried pasts and meticulously planned vengeance. While he can't outdo his quintessential and haunting performance in "Night of the Hunter," he still turns in a solid performance as Jeff Bailey...or is it Markham? The clarification of Jeff's identity is merely the tip of the iceberg when he is spotted by an old crony and learns that his last boss, an incendiary rogue named Whit (Kirk Douglas) has been wanting to meet with him for some time. Shortly thereafter, Jeff and his girlfriend embark to a trip to Lake Tahoe to visit Whit and along the way, Jeff recounts the sordid affair of his previous life that made him flee into hiding and warns her about the demons he will have to face when he picks his former persona up at the end of the ride.

This is a dark, but wonderfully intriguing tale filled with the usual murder, backstabbing, adultery, setups and blackmail a good film noir possesses. Sure, the plot has more twists than "It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" has comedian cameos, but I'll be damned if it doesn't draw you further in to the mystery of the film instead of leaving you confused. Kirk Douglas is delightfully nasty, so much so that you hold your breath when Jeff meets him in Lake Tahoe for the first time since his hiatus, half expecting Whit to unload a couple of slugs into the disgraced detective. Mitchum turns in an equally stellar and hypnotic performance that reminds you why he achieved leading man status despite his unusual countenance. And then there's Jane Greer as the femme fatale who has both Jeff and Whit all out of sorts, and to be quite frank, who can blame them? For a dame like that, I'd throw some of my scruples out the window too.

Watch a Clip

Day 302: The Stepfather (1987) - Rank 4/5

2010-01-05T18:49:00.000-08:00

I've always been a fan of Terry O'Quinn (and this is coming from someone who has never seen an episode of "Lost"). His no-nonsense deliveries give him a memorable presence as a character actor, regardless of the role. So when the remake of "The Stepfather" pushed the original out onto DVD after a long "out of print" life, I chomped at the bit to see O'Quinn take on the role of a manic serial killer. The story has its fair share of plot holes and implausibilities, but what serial killer film doesn't. The main thing that matters is that the film is designed as a vehicle for O'Quinn, and thankfully he doesn't fail to satisfy.

O'Quinn devours the scenery as Henry Morrison, a man determined to live out teh American dream with the quintessential family. He's mild-mannered enough, but if the family dynamic begins to break down, he snaps, kills the lot and moves on to a new city and family, like a hermit crab changing shells. The credit sequence sets the tone and premise fabulously, as Morrison shaves, cuts his hair and transforms himself to a new appearence before jauntily strolling out the house past his dismembered family. It's light fare as far as psychological thrillers go (though O'Quinn is positively frightening when his armor begins to crack), and the kill count is surprisingly low, but it's fun all the same.

Watch the Trailer

Day 301: Brute Force (1947) - Rank 5/5

2010-01-05T18:23:00.000-08:00

From Jules Dassin, the man who impressed me with the gritty, masochistic nature of highway fruit stands in "Thieves' Highway," comes a film that could easily serve as a wonderful companion piece to "The Shawshank Redemption." A prison break is at the center of this stark masterpiece, but unlike so many of its dime-a-dozen brethren that spawned out of Hollywood in the thirties through fifties, "Brute Force" really has an edge. That jagged sense of tension is due to the well-calculated direction of Dassin and the performances of Burt Lancaster and Hume Cronyn.

Lancaster is Joe Collins, a rough and tumble thug who spends half of his prison time in solitary for disorderly conduct and the occasional, well-orchestrated "accident" that results in the death of other inmates. When he organizes a prison break that sounds feasible, despite the alleged perfection of the facility, he gather a crew and sets it into motion (with the likes of Jeff Corey, Edmond O'Brien and Whit Bissel playing fellow cons). Little does he know that Captain Munsey and his guards are well aware of the break and see it as the perfect opportunity to receive carte blanc on the cruelty they can administer. Cronyn threw me for a loop with his reserved, yet sadistic performance. Cronyn mercilessly beats one prisoner while he drives another to suicide without flinching, giving Clancy Brown's Byron Hadley (the head guard in "Shawshank") a run for his money. Pitted against Lancaster, who delivers his performance like a knotted fist and you've got one tense, but badass movie.

Watch the Trailer

Day 300: The Match King (1932) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-03T16:40:00.000-08:00

I caught this little gem at 2:00 AM while channel surfing on TCM and was hooked until the end. Only did my research reveal later that the film is so obscure, not only does it lack a release onto VHS or DVD, but I couldn't find any original artwork for it either. No matter. The film is the tale of persuasive con man Paul Kroll (Warren William), based on real life crook Ivar Kreuger (known as the "Match King"). Kroll demonstrates his knack early on for accruing money through dubious means, convincing his foreman to cash and split paychecks for nonexistent employees and grifting what cash he can off of folks on the street. Shortly thereafter, he returns to his native Sweden, at the behest of his family, to save the family match factory. Not only does he do that, but he creates what can only be described as a primitive Ponzi scheme in which he buys up all the factories in Sweden and begins passing out fraudulent loans to corrupt officials in other countries in an effort to expand his empire. But as the old adage goes, the bigger they are, the harder they fall.

The film had me hooked early on due to the magnetic screen presence of Warren William. He conveys a wonderful panache as Kroll, even as he drowns partners and sleeps with women with only furthering his ill-gotten gains in mind. So much so, that I'm motivated to check out some of his other works. It's a real pity that the film is not available on DVD, because I'd really like to watch this flick again. I guess I just need to take up channel surfing in the middle of the night more regularly.

Watch the Trailer

Day 299: The Red Shoes (1948) - Rank 4/5

2010-01-03T16:00:00.000-08:00

Just for the record, I love Technicolor films, and "The Red Shoes" is a prime reminder as to why. Almost every scene of the film is positively saturated with every color of the rainbow. The very nature of the plot is also conducive to ample stunning visuals, for its a story within a story adaptation of the fairy tale by the same name. The original fairy tale tells of a girl who is compelled to dance once she puts on a pair of enchanted ballet shoes. The film surrounds a young dancer, Vicky Page (Moira Shearer), who desires to be a famous ballerina and is given just that chance by the nefarious Boris Lermontov, whose desires to feature her in his next production are as unscrupulous as you can imagine. While working under Lermontov, Vicky falls in love with his composer, Julian, and soon Lermontov and Julian are competing for the vivacious dancer. Ah, but they learn all too late that her first love is dancing.

I mentioned the "story within a story" motif - it just so happens that the ballet that shoots Vicky to stardom is Julian's adaptation of "The Red Shoes." The film switches back and forth between reality and the world of the ballet. Furthermore, the structure of the plot condemns Vicky to a life as tortured as that of her leading role. Between these parallel storylines operating simultaneously and the clever switches back and forth between reality and fiction, "The Red Shoes" feels ahead of its time in terms of writing and direction.

Watch the Trailer

Day 298: A Serious Man (2009) - Rank 4.5/5

2010-01-03T15:12:00.000-08:00

For me, the Coen brothers rarely disappoint. Even the much lamented "The Ladykillers" remake has a spot on my DVD shelf (the main gripe that I heard from folks was that it loses its humor and momentum when rolling into the latter third of the film, but I contend: so does the original...which is also on my DVD shelf...). But speaking as someone who can count the number of Coen brothers films he hasn't seen on one hand, I believe that the duo are one of the more solid collaborating teams out there. Their films not only immerse you into the world of their characters, but their daily lives as well. And what a miserable life Larry Gopnik does have.

The Jewish physics professor is facing trouble receiving tenure at his university due to anonymous letters sullying his character, his wife is openly having an affair and demanding a divorce, he's engaged in a property war with his redneck neighbor on one side and experiencing sexual frustration from a nude sunbather on the other, his son is engaging in escalating misbehavior at school...the list goes on. Larry seeks spiritual advice for his plight from a series of rabbis, but each offers little insight into his problems. As is the case with the best of the Coen brothers' serious works, such as "Blood Simple" or the more recent "No Country for Old Men," the film is, simply put, a work of art. The characters, misanthropic and depraved as they may be at times, are human to a fault. And as is the case with any work of art, the interpretations are infinite.

The most obvious allegory present is that of the book of Job, which chronicles the plight of one man who strives to remain faithful to God despite one misfortune after the next. Certainly this is apparent in Larry's situation, but it's never clear how strong his faith truly is. When he seeks to possibly strengthen it, the rabbis serve only to addle his judgment further, a potential, sly social commentary on the futility of organized religions that claim to help individuals comprehend life's purpose, but succeed in masking it instead. Michael Stuhlbarg should definitely have an Oscar nod in the bag, and I really wouldn't be surprised to see the film make the Best Picture list (especially since the nomination list has opened up to ten potential candidates).

I'm certainly glad I managed to catch the film during its short theatrical life. I had a suspicion that the movie would not last long in theatres. As callous as it might be to say it, the film is too Jewish for your average American filmgoer. General audiences like the familiar, even if it's on another planet (hey, white dudes conquering planets has been a staple of sci-fi for a century). If it is the unfamiliar, then you can usually attract audiences by making it a comedy (because Americans like to laugh at things that are different or cultures that they don't understand. Examples: "My Big Fat Greek Wedding," half of Woody Allen's films). There is humor present in "A Serious Man," but it's very dark and cultural. Me? I'm the complete opposite. I was almost absorbed more in Hebrew school and the rigmarole involved in seeing a rabbi that I was in the actual storyline. I love a story that's absolutely saturated in a culture foreign to me. "Gosford Park" would be another prime example, for I was so fascinated by the social etiquette and daily workings of a large, manor staff that I could have cared less about the actual murder. So, a long digression made short, "A Serious Man" = excellent film.

Watch the Best/Most Original Trailer of the Year

Day 297: Goodfellas (1990) - Rank 4.5/5

2010-01-03T12:26:00.000-08:00

My friends who view "The Godfather" as the be all and end all of great films also hold Scorsese's "Goodfellas" in high regard. While I contend that "The Godfather" and its first sequel are both masterpieces of cinema, neither are pictures that I can just pop in on any given day. "Goodfellas" would fall into that same category, though I would deem it of greater "repeat watchability" than the Coppola films. My reasoning? It's purely subjective (hell, which of these reviews aren't?), but "Goodfellas" romanticizes organized crime quite well. I don't use the term in the sense that dames left theatres in 1990 swooning at the thought of being married to a coke dealer. But the film succeeded at a very important aspect - making the life of a "wise guy" look really fucking cool (until, as is typically the case in this genre of films, the protagonist's life inexorably turns to shit). Adding further resonance to the film is the fact that it's based on true-life incidents within the mob (or as accurate as any film adaptation of reality can be).

This element of "damn, it feels cool to be a gangster" of the story is imperative if you want the audience to bond with Henry Hill (Ray Liotta in one of the few roles I've ever regarded Liotta as tolerable), and to understand how he goes from a troublemaking urchin in Little Italy to an integral member of organized crime. Though it's hard not to find the idea of being a gangster cool when it means that you get to work with rogues like the wheeling and dealing Jimmy Conway (Robert DeNiro) and the spastic Tommy DeVito (Joe Pesci at his most Joe Pesci). Ooh, better yet, having Paul Sorvino cook meals for you on a regular basis. That would be the shit. I'd move stolen merchandise in a heartbeat if I could have that. The problem is, if I had a Paul Sorvino of my very own, I'd have to force him to play alternating 1990 movie roles for me. As Paulie Cicero, he could prepare meals all day long and then as Lips Manlis, he could eat everything he made earlier in the day and make demands of himself for more food. If I was feeling greedy, I would make him argue with himself only in opera. It probably wouldn't work, but watching Sorvino attempt to do it would be so awesome that I would have a stroke from entertainment overload. Oh, if only a life of crime were that cool...

Watch the Trailer

Day 296: House of Frankenstein (1943) - Rank 2.5/5

2010-01-03T12:05:00.000-08:00

The last of the Frankenstein series was definitely the most difficult when it came to engaging myself in its plot. It's funny that I found it more trying, because I found "House of Dracula" so much fun. Both films are similar in the sense that they're merely an amalgamation of several franchises, featuring Frankenstein! Wolf Man! Dracula!..um...Hunchback! (though not of the Notre Dame variety)...and the ever ambivalent, staple, generic Mad Scientist...! The mad scientist, in this scenario, is played by Karloff, who passes his bolts onto Glenn Strange (a worthy successor to Karloff that went on to play the monster in two other films).

The story seems to be all over the place as Karloff's Dr. Niemann attempts to exact revenge on an old foe. Dracula (John Carradine) is clumsily lost off of the back of a wagon, exposed to sunlight and quickly dies. The Wolf Man slips out of Niemann's grip and wreaks havoc on the nearby village, leaving the titular Frankenstein monster with about ten minutes screen time. I suppose it's no more orderly than "House of Dracula," but I felt like "House of Dracula" was more tongue-in-cheek, making the monster mayhem a bit more fun.

Watch the Trailer

Day 295: The Ghost of Frankenstein (1943) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-03T11:50:00.000-08:00

This is the first film in the Universal franchise to not feature Karloff in the iconic role of Frankenstein's monster. Sadly, the film suffers as a result. Pity, because there are a lot of fun elements to the story. A generous portion of the film's plot is lampooned by the better known "Young Frankenstein" (though none of the films are same from Mel Brooks' satire). The story follows Ludwig Frankenstein (Sir Cedric Harwicke), a successful surgeon who left the rest of family to pursue a sane career in medicine. He's roped into returning to his hometown by the town's prosecutor (Ralph Bellamy) after the Frankenstein monster is caught, to see if he can be of any assistance. Amidst the chaos of the courtroom, Ludwig brings solace to the monster's rage for the beast senses elements of its master within the doctor (a clever little plot point). Then the madness of his family begins to sink in as Ludwig devises a means to correct the monster's animalistic ways - by giving it a new brain. Ah, but the manipulative Ygor (Bela Lugosi) has his own scheme that involves his mind in the body of the monster.

As I said, a fairly cool story, considering this is the fourth installation the series (with two more to follow). The problem is Lon Chaney Jr. under Jack Pierce's makeup. He's too wooden, enacting more a stereotype of Karloff's performances than an extension. That lifelessness takes the humanity out of the monster, making him less of a pivotal character and more of an incidental component of the plot. But an excellent cast, rounded out with Lionel Atwill as Frankenstein's untrustworthy protegee.

Watch the Trailer

Day 294: Torso (1973) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-03T11:30:00.000-08:00

I was motivated to catch this film for a couple of reasons. First and foremost was the fact that my friend Eagle decided to don the outfit of the film's killer during this past Halloween. I'd been apprised as to who he was prior to arriving at his party, but humorously enough, he wouldn't say a word (nor had he the entire evening, despite being the party's cohost). I was intrigued by the film further when I learned that Sergio Martino was at its helm, the master of the bizarre behind "All the Colors of the Dark."

"Torso" was predictable in theme in the sense that it's a slasher flick - simple and straightforward. Girls arrive on camera and clothing drops to the floor shortly before limbs do on a fairly regular basis. In fact, my boss Bryan has frequently cited "boobs and decapitation" as the two watermarks a horror film must bear to be deemed acceptably entertaining. If I recall correctly, "Torso" had those two items checked off the list approximately fifteen minutes in. But to label the entire film as predictable would be unjust, because there's no foreseeing who the killer is. The plot makes every single character in the film a red herring. And as for the ending, you would be more likely to watch Nicolas Roeg's "Don't Look Now" and say, "I saw that finish coming a mile away" more than you would here.

What struck me was how utterly bleak the film makes Italy. One of the film's victims meets her end in a bog that resembles the swamp of sadness set from "The Neverending Story." Granted, giallo flicks never make Italy look gorgeous, but having only the visual style of "All the Colors..." as a reference, I expected more of a stylistic aesthetic to be apparent. The grungy feel of the sets do add to the unpleasant atmosphere of dread that saturates the film like a languorous smog, making it a more memorable slasher piece - especially when you take into consideration that this film is considered to be the first true predecessor to the slasher subgenre of horror.

Watch the Trailer

Day 293: Dark Star (1974) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-02T14:29:00.000-08:00

It's hard not to find so many elements of John Carpenter's first opus endearing. With Dan O'Bannon, he created a student film that garnered enough attention to receive theatrical distribution. Never mind the fact that some of the special effects encroach on the laughably absurd - to hell with it, they are laughably absurd. A beach ball as an antagonistic alien is positively cheesy, but it's hard not to smile as it creates chaos on the ship.

There are some aspects to the plot that drag it out a bit, primarily the digressions and bickering among the crew members (their goal and the basic plot of the film is blowing up "unstable planets" about the galaxy). While humorous at first, their arguments and existential rhetoric tend to go on too long (conversely, I did enjoy the philosophical debate between Lt. Doolittle and a talking, thinking bomb that is on the verge of destroying the ship). But overall, it's an exercise in low budget filmmaking that has undoubtedly served as an inspiration to other independent filmmakers as to what can be produced with a few bucks and a lot of imagination and determination.

Watch the Trailer

Day 292: Possession (1981) - Rank 4/5

2010-01-02T14:12:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure if I truly liked this film or not, but I can say one thing: I couldn't draw my eyes away from the screen. While the analogy is dreadfully overused, it was like watching a train wreck - horrific and grisly, yet there's something about the carnage that's hypnotic. Sam Neill and Isabele Adjani both turn in amazing - nay - frightening performances as a couple whose marriage is fast collapsing. Mark (Neill) returns home after a business trip and finds that his wife Anna (Adjani) wishes to leave him, admitting that she has found a new lover. Mark tracks down her lover Heinrich only to find that Anna has spurned him as well. So who is she sleeping with exactly? The question should not be who, but what, for Anna's new love is a creature that looks almost like a half-human, half-penis, drenched in placenta drippings, which moves about with the aid of multiple tentacles.

The film falls into the "What the hell did I just watch?" category reserved for some of the more bizarre films that have arisen, from many of Lynch's films to newer puzzlements, such as "Uzumaki," "Audition" or "Visions of Suffering." In fact, it's somewhat akin to Lynch's "Eraserhead" in the sense that if "Eraserhead" is the manifestation of a nightmare a man has after finding out that his girlfriend is pregnant, then "Possession" is a nightmare that one might have at the first signs of a divorce. It's not a pretty film to watch by any means, but the allure of seeing a film where Sam Neill drowns a man in a toilet filled with vomit is hard to resist.

Watch the Trailer

Day 291: Black Sunday (1960) - Rank 3.5/5

2010-01-02T12:50:00.000-08:00

I'm sure it will be a horror faux pas not to give the quintessential Mario Bava pic the highest of marks, but there was just an element that kept me from being completely hooked into the story. The trouble is, upon reflection, it's hard to say exactly what. My first instinct is to suggest pacing, for the plot does unfold at a deliberately somber rate. However, there are a number of horror films I absolutely love from that era, from "The Haunting" to the Corman/Price Poe adaptations that progress at a slower rate. I can't criticize the script either, for not only is it pretty solid within its own right, but it also invokes a delightfully macabre atmosphere, not unlike good Lovecraft tales. The cinematography as eerily beautiful as much of the work Conrad Hall in the black and white medium and the acting moody...so why didn't the film grab me?

The more I think about it, the more I have to place the blame on unrealistically high expectations based on too much hype. Typically, hype only ruins a newer film for me - the very reason I held off on seeing "Star Trek" upon its original release. So why did "Black Sunday" have so much buzz about it considering it's a fifty year old film? Well, simply put, I hang out with a lot of old school horror geeks. I will point out though that the film merits revisitation at a later date, simply because, as I already mentioned, for all intents and purposes, I should have loved this film.

By the way, as you may note, the year is over, but I shall finish the backlog of reviews from films I watched in 2009 before I leave the blog be, even if I'm only writing these reflections for myself.

Watch the Trailer

Day 290: Dead Ringers (1988) - Rank 5/5

2009-12-24T13:07:00.000-08:00

For anyone who doubts that the awesomeness that is Jeremy Irons, he needs only to watch “Die Hard with a Vengeance” to see the actor at the pinnacle of his career. But as hard as it may be to believe, Irons does outdo his stellar performance as the brother of Alan Rickman (oh, if only they really were brothers, what an awesome family that would be…). Irons assumes the roles of twin gynecologists in David Cronenberg’s dark tale of mutant women and the men who pine for them.

Elliot and Beverly act as a yin and yang for one another – Elliot is the extroverted of the two, making the majority of the public appearances for the duo and conquering women with the slightest of ease, while Beverly is quiet, intellectual and shy, creating the majority of the innovations the two are known for and humbly accepting the females that Twin A has spurned. When Beverly falls in love with movie actress Claire Niveau (Genevieve Bujold), yet another reject of Elliot, and he finds himself rejected by her, his world collapses. He regresses into a realm of drug-addiction and depression to the point that he creates custom gynecological tools that look more like torture devices. It’s evident that Beverly can only regard all women as mutants as his sense of alienation grows out of control, and soon Elliot finds himself spiraling in a similar downfall, for the two are interlinked through emotion and experience. Irons was nominated for an Oscar for his performance and deservedly so. He portrays the identical twins in such contrasting ways that not even the viewer has trouble distinguishing between the two. As time has passed, I’ve found myself repeatedly reflecting back upon this film, leading me to the conclusion that this is definitely one of Cronenberg’s best (though certainly not the most pleasant to watch).

Watch the Trailer

Day 289: His Girl Friday (1940) - Rank 3.5/5

2009-12-24T13:00:00.000-08:00

Here’s Cary Grant in yet another screwball comedy that’s reminiscent of “Brining Up, Baby.” Once again, the tale is occurring on the cusp of a wedding, though Rosalind Russell is the bride-to-be. She’s on the verge of departing on her honeymoon when she’s roped into an execution/jailbreak story by her old editor and flame, (Grant). Grant stirs the embers of her newshound ways and ropes her back into his life under the guise that he needs her to assist him with the scoop of the century.

The series of shenanigans that are tied together loosely with a plot are entertaining enough, though they start to feel flat about halfway in. I feel as if at one stage, the writer thought, “Damn it, this story’s getting too absurd for its own good” and so he roped back in some of the more rational characters to tone down the antics, leaving the film feeling a little uneven at points. However, Cary Grant still delivers his trademark, befuddled charm like only Hugh Grant desperately wishes he could.

Watch the Trailer

Day 288: Friday the Thirteenth: The Final Chapter (1984) - Rank 2.5/5

2009-12-24T12:56:00.000-08:00

What can I say here? The fourth installment of the “Friday the Thirteenth” trilogy is filled with all the pathos, metaphorical imagery and subtle character development that one would expect from the fourth installment of any horror franchise. The killings that take place throughout the film are merely incidental to the plot which focuses on a group of young teenagers who want nothing more than to embrace life. Their inebriated revelry and debaucherous, sexual escapades are representative of the freedom of youth. Jason, then, could correctly be interpreted as an allegory for adulthood and responsibility.

Jason strikes down every adolescent he can the moment that they begin to revel in the pleasures of fleshly love. It is only the actions of a young Corey Feldman that quell the beast. His soothing gesture is to shave his head and make himself appear as the deliverer of swift, machete justice. While the ending can be interpreted in a multitude of manners, it’s clear that the filmmakers have one moral they wish to convey: the appearance of early maturity is advantageous during the annals of adolescence. Feldman survives by donning the attire of the representation of authority. Truly, if we all wish to escape the persecution of our oppressors, we must live under the guise that we are like they. But, don’t be fooled, for as the film demonstrates, only the façade is necessary to dupe the antagonist, not the alteration of one’s morals. Perhaps this is the most dangerous message of all then, for the story seems to say: convince you superiors that you are one of them and when their vengeance is quelled, strike them down with greater haste. It’s surprising then that the film didn’t spark a youth revolt upon its release. I think that the fault then lies in the fact that a young Crispin Glover is called upon to dance ad nauseum during the film’s third act – a display so cryptic that even the most analytical of viewers fail to interpret the message behind the gyrations.

Watch the Trailer

Day 287: The Virgin Spring (1960) - Rank 4.5/5

2009-12-24T12:52:00.000-08:00

The story begins when a young, nubile girl hiking through the woods comes across comes across a pair of men, one of whom is accompanied by his son. At first their meeting is pleasant, but it’s not long before the girl is raped and killed. Later, the killers seek lodging at the home of the girl’s family and it isn’t long before the father figures out who they are. He must then decide if he should reduce himself to their level and exact a similar revenge to their crime.

While this might sound like I’m describing the premise to Wes Craven’s “Last House on the Left,” “The Virgin Spring” is actually a pensive little exercise in revenge by Ingmar Bergman. As is customary is Bergman’s tales, faith is an intertwining theme between incidents. (Max von Sydow) is a pious man who feels as if he’s going throught eh trials of Job throughout the incident, and despite his devout, religious beliefs, his overwhelming desire is to make his murderous houseguests suffer as much as he can. But despite the dark theme of the film, it’s beautifully shot and told, making it feel like a lost parable brought to life.

Day 286: The Black Cat (1941) - Rank 2/5

2009-12-21T15:33:00.000-08:00

The premise of a black comedy featuring Basil Rathbone and Bela Lugosi was certainly a promising one. In fact, the story of a group of money-hungry relatives preying on the misfortunes of an old woman with the hopes of gaining her inheritance is not a bad one at that. But the execution for this Universal horror flick left something to be desired. The pacing is abominably slow and I found myself stopping the film and coming back to it twice. That's pretty sad when the film's runtime is 69 minutes.

Hell, I won't beat around the bush anymore. I just don't like Hugh Herbert. Sure, I've got a penchant for character actors, especially those with memorable schticks, from Franklin Pangborn's finger tenting to Frank Nelson's trademark "Yeeesssss." But Herbert's "hoo-hoo" laugh and bumbling nature just rubs me the wrong way. He feels like a cheap alternative to Lou Costello. And much to the dismay of many film fans, I will attest that while I love classic wacky comedy, from the Marx Brothers to the Three Stooges, I just don't find Abbot and Costello funny. So, needless to say, it doesn't help for a film to bank the majority of its humor around a comedian whose stylings are reminiscent of a medium that I detest. A Herbert caricature did appear regularly on Looney Tunes shorts, so evidently he was popular for some unearthly reason.

Day 285: Paranormal Activity (2007) - Rank 3.5/5

2009-12-21T15:09:00.000-08:00

It should be obvious by many of my reviews that I like low-budget horror. So when I hear that a film that cost $15,000 to make is receiving a national release, I can't help but indulge. The film features a lot of entertaining, yet effective "spookshow" elements to advance the plot and heighten the suspense. The general gist of the story is that a young couple believes that their house is haunted and so they decide that they shall tape every aspect of their days, including their nights in bed, in the hopes of capturing proof that something is amiss. A lot of the tricks that are used, from doors slowly creaking shut to odd bangs on the wall are unnerving. On more than one occasion, Katie (the girl who seems to be the target of the haunting demon's aggressions) arises from bed in the middle of the night and stares at her boyfriend, Micah, for hours on end, practically unmoving. She also seems to go into moments of mild possession where she will carry out acts that she does not remember later and artifacts from her childhood reappear with no logical reason as to how or why.

Unfortunately, writer/director Olen Peri gets very greedy at more than one point in the film. There's one scene featuring a Ouija board that is operated by an unseen hand shortly before it bursts into flame. Another shot features footprints appearing on the floor. Regardless of the "real-life circumstances," this is footage that, if real, would have had the attention of every paranormal investigator in the nation. So why Katie and Micah see these things occur and still take the events in stride is beyond plausibility. Furthermore, there seems to be a legitimate push to explain what is happening to the audience, with even a discovery of a website where another woman went through Katie's experiences, went crazy, blah, blah, blah.

I'm a firm believer of the "less is more" theory, because what is unknown is more frightening than what is defined, for that is the point that your imagination can run amok. It's merely indicative of our culture, for American audiences demand explanations and want to see everything. Speaking from ten years experience at a movie theatre, I can attest that films that feature ambiguous resolutions that are open to interpretation do not appeal to the average filmgoer. So the need to rationalize everything is a chronic problem that ruins too many films with great potential. However, "The Blair Witch Project" is not only reminiscent of "Paranormal Activity" in terms of plot devices and production, but it also features a highly indefinite finale, and it was a high grossing film. So with successful predecessors, it's saddening that "Paranormal Activity" went for the easy out. Kudos to the film though, for making the first night of going to sleep alone after viewing it a little uneasy.

Watch the Trailer

Day 284: All the Colors of the Dark (1972) - Rank 4/5

2009-12-21T14:54:00.000-08:00

Like the greatest of giallo, "All the Colors of the Dark" (aka "They're Coming to Get You") is convoluted beyond compare. It features more red herrings than a fish market and any notion of a conventional plot is thrown out the window. And yet, the film is a lot of fun because it embraces the absurd, almost becoming self-parody, and it features great cinematography to boot. The best synopsis of the plot I can extrapolate is the film's heroine, Jane, is having bizarre nightmares, allegedly brought on by repressed trauma from her mother's death and a miscarriage. Everyone around her has solutions to her problems - her husband suggests pills, her sister suggests psychoanalysis and hypnosis and her neighbor suggests Satanic ritual (Satanic rituals? What won't they cure?)

Pretty soon Jane's nightmares take form in reality as she becomes an integral member of the cult. Are the cult followers vampires or ghouls? Is Jane crazy or is she a victim of a crazy plot? If she is going mad, who is pushing her to the limits of her sanity? Even after you complete the film, the answers to these questions will be a tad fuzzy. However, you don't watch Argento or Fulci films for coherence either; you watch their films for fun, tits and gore, and those are three fronts on which this film delivers.

Watch the Trailer

Day 283: The Great Buck Howard (2009) - Rank 4/5

2009-12-21T14:39:00.000-08:00

This is possibly the best John Malkovich vehicle since "Being John Malkovich." Rather than playing himself, the eccentric actor is a hammy, washed-up mentalist who spends his days in the limelight of backwoods towns, performing for crowds of dozens. However, when he manages to hypnotize an entire lobby of people in the absnence of any cameras, the rumor mill exaggerates the act and soon he's back on top. Malkovich is endearingly quirky as Howard, greeting fans with aggressive handshakes and bombastically declaring "I love this town!" at every new venue.

The main crux of the story, though, is not that of Buck Howard but of Troy Gable (Colin Hanks). Gable drops out of law school to take on the demeaning job as Buck's attache, much to his father's disapproval (played by Big Daddy Hanks - I'm guessing Colin roped him in for the star power angle to help rope in curious viewers). Troy's story has been done before, so it doesn't leave as much of an impression as John Malkovich's performance. In fact, had Malkovich been absent from the film, the result would have been mediocre at best, though there is a fun supporting cast, featuring the likes of Ricky Jay and Steve Zahn. I recall that this broke Louisville at the Village Eight during its transition period and as a result, very few people saw it. Pity. I feel like had this film opened at Baxter, it would have generated decent enough word of mouth to keep it running for a while (a la "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" or "Little Miss Sunshine"). Instead, it shall undoubtedly find a modest following on DVD.

Watch the Trailer

Day 282: Harakiri (1962) - Rank 5/5

2009-12-20T14:43:00.000-08:00

The first twenty minutes sets the scene for this epic film set in 17th century Japan. Noble samurai Hanshiro arrives at the palace of Lord Saito, hoping that the lord will allow him to commit seppaku on his grounds (for he deems it an honorable place to do so). Saito is skeptical, explaining to Hanshiro that the land has many wandering transients claiming to be samurai who wish to perform seppaku in the hopes that the feudal lords will placate their grief and poverty with money, rather than allowing them to kill themselves. Saito makes it known that he is not like those other lords and that Hanshiro will be forced to kill himself if he claims that is his wish. Saito recounts a tale of the last samurai that came to his palace, a man whom he deemed a fraud because the ronin had a sword and dagger made of bamboo. That man was forced to kill himself, very slowly and painfully, with the flimsy bamboo dagger. Hanshiro insists that his wishes are genuine and later, before the ceremony begins, Hanshiro requests a special second to assist him with the ceremony. While the requested guard is sought, Hanshiro essentially says, "Now let me tell you a story. You recall that samurai you mentioned earlier? I knew him - he was like a son to me."

From that moment, I was hooked. Hanshiro casually recounts the tale as to how his foster son ended up in the predicament he did, and along the way, we come to learn that a great deal of revenge has been enacted upon Lord Saito already, unbeknownst to the nefarious host. The film features spectacular sword battles, including a finale fight that was undoubtedly the inspiration behind the Bride's battle with the Crazy Eighty-Eight at the end of "Kill Bill Vol. 1." Quite simply, this was one of the most impressive revenge stories I've seen in a good, long while.

Watch the Trailer

Day 281: Slither (2006) - Rank 4/5

2009-12-20T14:23:00.000-08:00

This is yet another film I wish I'd caught in theatres, while mildly intoxicated in the company of friends. With practical effects gore abound and a schlocky plot, it screams "drive-in fare." Pity is was originally released in the cold barrens of March. The story is reminiscent of Fred Dekker's "Night of the Creeps." When I first saw the trailers for the film, I assumed it was a rip-off of the 1986 B-film and never caught it as a result. The film does borrow elements from "Night of the Creeps," but it snags aspects of a half dozen other 1980's horror films. So I suppose judging the film as a remake/rip-off would be as logical as deeming every one of Tarantino's films, especially the "Kill Bill" films as a rip-off as well.

The story does center around alien slugs that turn humans into zombies, just as "Night of the Creeps" did. However, while fraternity douchebags seemed to be the target of Dekker's piece, "Slither" sets its sights on South Carolina rednecks. Actually, I'll stop there, because to reduce a review to a comparison between the two is about as frivolous and belittling to the film as is a high school essay detailing the differences between the novel "I Know What You Did Last Summer" and the film adaptation ("Aw, man...they totally changed the ending. Bummer"). Simply put, the movie's a hell of a lot of fun, especially with half-man, half slug Michael Rooker pitted against Nathan Fillon. I'd liken it to drinking a forty of King Cobra - it won't make you more intelligent and it's certainly far from classy, but if you're with friends, it's a great way to kill a night...and I can't believe I just made that analogy work.

Watch the Trailer

Day 280: Tokyo! (2009) - Rank 4/5

2009-12-20T14:03:00.000-08:00

The film is a spectacle of an anthology featuring the directorial work of Michel Gondry ("Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind," "Human Nature"), Leox Carax ("Lovers on the Bridge") and Bong Joon-ho ("The Host"). Each half-hour vignette was theoretically created with the intent of capturing the spirit of the Japanese city, similar to the way that "Paris, Je T'aime" did the European highlight. However, I never felt like the stories immersed me into Japanese culture. I've always found that "Lost in Translation" did so successfully from an American point of view, capturing the sense of isolation and curiosity that emerges when one is a visitor to a foreign land. With the three tales within "Tokyo!" I felt that they could have been set within any major metropolis and still worked.

Gondry's story focuses on a girl who is slowly alienated by her peers and begins to turn into a chair. Joon-ho's tale centers around an obsessive-compulsive shut in that seemingly finds love in a strange, possibly post-apocalyptic future. The theme behind both is centered around the loss of identity and loneliness that comes from living in a major city. The most entertaining of the trio, Carax's "Merde," is the story of a feral, unkempt man who resides in Tokyo's sewers, eats chrysanthemums and periodically terrorizes residents with grenade attacks. When captured, he's put on trial in what is clearly an allegory for Western reaction and treatment of middle-east terrorists. There are even moments that mirror the final days of Saddam Hussein. The story calls to question the motivation behind such individuals and the aspects of hypocrisy that arise in determining punishment for them. However, as I mentioned before, I never felt like there was some unifying theme that tied the trio together and made the Tokyo setting imperative. Perhaps choosing three non-Japanese directors was the problem, but at least those three are excellent enough in their work to generate an intriguing piece.

Watch the Trailer

Day 279: Frankenstein and the Monster from Hell (1973) - Rank 3.5/5

2009-12-20T13:50:00.000-08:00

The last of the Frankenstein installments out of Hammer studios is still fun fare. This time, Cushing returns once more as the infamous Baron Frankenstein, only Frankenstein is absolutely daft. Imprisoned in an insane asylum, Frankenstein soon rises to power over the director though blackmailing means. There he uses his power to eliminate patients who possess desirable body parts for repairing his monster. A loony violinist provides supple hands for the monster, while the brain of a mad genius gives the monster new noggin meat.

Frankenstein is assisted by a doctor who was imprisoned for crimes similar to his own. Together the two bring new life to the monster, at which point it promptly and predictably runs amok. The story would feel overtired were it not for the presence of Cushing, who adds an amazing air of credibility to the notorious baron. David Prowse also has an early role as the monster itself, and Terence Fisher, the man behind some of the studio's better works, is behind the camera once more. The storyline scarcely surpasses its predecessors (especially the supremely smashing "Revenge of Frankenstein") but it is worth the watch for those fans of Cushing's horror work.

Watch the Trailer

Day 278: La Belle et la Bête (1946) - Rank 4.5/5

2009-12-20T13:33:00.000-08:00

This ain't a Disney-fied take on Le Prince de Beaumont's classic, cautionary fairy tale. Jean Cocteau presents a film that may have lapses of logic, but is never devoid of phantasmagoric beauty. To give a plot synopsis would be moot, for most individuals are familiar with the tale of a woman falling in love with her inhuman captor (Stockholm syndrome at its mythical best). What is worth mentioning is that this is one of the most beautiful films in the history of cinema. Cocteau's knack for breathtaking visuals in "Orphee" was what lured me towards the film.

Jean Marais, the star of "Orphee" (and Cocteau's lover for a time), plays both the role of the garrulous Gaston, the egotistic hunter seeking Belle's affection, as well as the Beast. The makeup for the Beast is far more elaborate than the work Jack Pierce was doing with Lon Chaney Jr. across the ocean. The set design and costuming dazzle the eye as well, enhancing Cocteau's surreal take on the tale. There are elements to the story that seem to be lost in translation, making a few minor plot points a little perplexing, but I would liken the overall viewing experience to watching a good, foreign opera - while everything that's transpiring may not make complete sense, the production is so gorgeous you cannot turn away.

Watch the Trailer

Day 277: The Old, Dark House (1932) - Rank 4.5/5

2009-12-20T13:16:00.000-08:00

This is one of the only films included in this ongoing list that I've watched before. In this situation, I include it only because I had a gathering of friends over to my home to watch it during the October season. I coupled it with "The Wolf Man," but I'm choosing to present only "The Old, Dark House" here because far too few film lovers are familiar with it. It's a shame really, for I think it's one of the best movies to come out of the Universal horror boom of the thirties and forties.

The film features two themes that are common to horror: a couple becoming stranded at a creepy manor on a dark and stormy night, and the subplot of a crazy relative locked in the attic of the home suddenly escaping. "The Old, Dark House" was the first film to feature these themes that have since been duplicated and butchered ad nauseum by decades of copycats. Here, our stranded travelers are Melvyn Douglas, Gloria Stuart and Charles Laughton, and our eerie hosts are Ernest Thesiger and Eva Moore. Thesiger and Moore plays Horace and Rebecca Femm, respectively, with wonderful, tongue-in-cheek glee. Horace Femm sets the scene as he greets his guests and then remarks "My sister was in the process of arranging these" before tossing a beautiful bouquet of fresh flowers into the fire.

Brember Wills is also one of the most terrifying villains in early cinema. With a scraggly beard and a twisted laugh, he jabs a knife into the table repeatedly in front of Douglas while soliloquizing on his studies of fire. "It's not hot at all, but cold as ice and sharp as knives." The film is probably overlooked because it doesn't feature a monster that could later reappear in numerous sequels (though Boris Karloff does appear as the Femm's alcoholic and lecherous butler), but it is a wonderfully atypical, early offering from a studio that made an early fortune on the horror genre.

Not a trailer, but a decent review

Day 276: Zombieland (2009) - Rank 5/5

2009-12-20T12:57:00.000-08:00

There are two genres of film that are terribly overdone in cinema today - angsty teen romance and zombie flicks. The first has been common theatre fare since "American Pie," where an awkward teen tries to get the girl, but his foibles and eccentricities get the best of him until the girl learns to love and appreciate him for those qualities. I suppose it could be argued that such characters have been around far longer (Corey Haim could play such characters to perfection in John Hughes films), but it's only become a trend in recent years to make such characters the driving force behind the plot rather than having them serve as comedic relief on the side. As for zombies...'nuff said. Seventy percent of the horror films released in this day and age have zombies somewhere and it's become a theme that's exhausted as vampires. However, the amalgamation of the two surprisingly worked.

I went in expecting to find the film predictable and mildly funny (I think I'm one of the few people in my circle of friends who found "Shaun of the Dead" too "by the books"), but instead, I was quite simply laughing my ass off. Woody Harrelson was tolerable, nay likable, as Tallahassee, a Twinkie-obsessed redneck who shacks up with a nervous, yet level-headed Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg aka "poor man's Michael Cera"...I kid!) in a post-apocalyptic world. Columbus finds himself pining for Wichita (Emma Stone), a foil to the duo, primarily because she's the only girl in a hundred-mile radius that will talk to him and isn't trying to devour his flesh.

At this late date, I don't think it counts as a spoiler to mention that Bill Murray also appears in the film in the most brilliant, self-parodying cameo I've ever witnessed. Tears of joy intermixed with tears of laughter as he chewed the scenery far more than the zombie hoards could. This was easily one of the more delightful surprises I've had in theatres this year, considering I went in expecting convention and tedium. Thankfully, I received neither.

Watch the Trailer

Day 275: Kiss of the Vampire (1963) - Rank 3.5/5

2009-12-20T12:37:00.000-08:00

Third in the vampire series by Hammer films and second film released sans Christopher Lee, "Kiss of the Vampire" stands up fairly well against its predecessors. This time, the victims are a honeymooning couple (Gerald and Marianne) that decided that Bavaria is a prime place to experience a romantic getaway (I'm sure that was a fad that had a half-life of two weeks in the early 20th century). The pair are invited to a dinner hosted by Dr. Ravna and his family in their luxurious and ominous castle. Marianne is turned into a vampire shortly thereafter and Gerald seeks the help of Dr. Zimmer (Clifford Evans acting qua Dr. Van Helsing) to bring his bride back.

The vampires in the film reflect the trend that was stared in "Brides of Dracula," where blood-suckery is an allegory for the cold nature of aristocracy. The parties held at the Ravna Castle are reminiscent of the celebration staged during the final act of Corman's "Masque of the Red Death" - colorful revelry masked by an ominous shadow. Evans doesn't rival Cushing's Dr. Van Helsing, but he's still fun to watch (though not nearly as entertaining as a sinister Noel Willman as the insideous Dr. Ravna). I find it somewhat sad though, that the hedonistic debauchery of vampire films of the sixties and seventies has been utterly replaced by teen angst and empty lust in the modern entries in the genre.

Watch the Trailer

Day 274: Twins of Evil (1971) - Rank 4/5

2009-12-20T12:21:00.000-08:00

Twins of evil? More like quadruplets of evil! Mary and Madeliene Collison, a pair of identical Playmates, take up residence with their Puritan, witch hunting uncle, Gustav (Peter Cushing, full of his usual, entrancing braggadocio). As i s typically the case with twins (at least within film), one is good (Maria) and one strays toward the naughty side of life (Frieda). Frieda is lured by her own desires to castle Karnstein where she revels in the pleasures of satanic love and badda-boom: vampire! Now Gustav has two problems: one, he must deal with the vampire menace of the village and two, he must save his niece from both vampirism and death at the hands of his witch hunter brethren.

I think it goes without saying that there's plenty of "bait and switch" within the plot. "How do we know which one is the vampire?" Poor Maria keeps ending up in the hands of the witch hunters. The film ranks up with "Vampire Circus" and "Captain Kronos" in the way of Hammer films that deviate from standard vampire lore. Delightfully dark, decidedly entertaining and, needless to say, a definite guy guilty pleasure. It's been a month and a half since I watched this film, but I still recall that those babies stay clad until the hour and twenty-one minute mark.

Watch the Trailer

Day 273: Woman in the Window (1944) - Rank 3.5/5

2009-12-20T10:41:00.000-08:00

This was the last of the "original five" film noirs that I had yet to see. The very concept of Fritz Lang teaming up with Edward G. Robinson is a golden one. Robinson's Professor Lanley is an expert on the psychology behind the homicidal mind, but his wits are put to the test when he murders a man. The victim is the enraged beau of Alice Reed (played seductively by Joan Bennett), a model who met Lanley when she caught the lumpy professor ogling her portrait in an art studio window. While the death could clearly be justified as self-defense, Lanley lets his libido do the thinking and acquiesces to Reed's suggestion of dumping the body in the woods.

It doesn't take a genius to foresee the perfect crime going awry, but a unique twist presented is Lanley happens to be best buds with the detective assigned tot eh case. Lanley struggles to mask clues as quickly as they're discovered. While the film is atmospheric and clever, it left a sour taste in my mouth at the finish. The cause? Possibly one of the worst/cliched endings I've seen in a film noir (and that's taking into account that the entire genre is based around convoluted plots and convention). I saw it as a cinematic "Fuck you" to the audience that can only be dwarfed by the saccharine wedding at the end of "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" (though the big difference here is that Crystal Skull really didn't have any redeeming qualities). Research proved my hypothesis on the twist, comedic ending: it was studio intervention. Pity, for what could have been a dark and powerful finale is reduced to a gag denouement that instills disappointment.

Watch the Trailer

Day 272: Phantom of the Opera (1962) - Rank 3/5

2009-12-20T10:14:00.000-08:00

After a month-long hiatus of posting reviews (though not from viewing films), due to a deceased computer and knee injury, I shall endeavor to get caught up on my reviews with great haste, meaning I will struggle to be as concise as conceivably possible. Considering my circumlocutory ways, that might prove impractical though. Anyway, the Hammer studios production of the classic Gaston Leroux novel is a nice mix of the fanciful and the morbid (thanks to the expertise of Hammer veteran director, Terence Fisher), but it doesn't rival its predecessors. Well, namely, the 1942 Universal production starring Claude Rains.

Yes, the garish countenance of Lon Chaney Sr.'s role made the Phantom infamous, but Rains really generated sympathy for the character's plight. Herbert Lom dons the plaster mask opposite Michael Gough (who plays the opera-thieving, lecherous Lord D'Arcy) and while he executes the role well, he lacks the power of "presence" that Chaney or Rains commanded. This might be due to the script, which reduces the film's climax to a more altruistic end for the Phantom. The dash of treacle does not do this permutation any good in my mind, but it's still hard to dislike the film, simply because the source material is so good. Though I suppose the same could be argued that such is the case with Charles Dickens' immortal "A Christmas Carol," but that's not going to sway me to sit through two hours of 3-D, Carrey hijinks.

Watch the Trailer

Day 271: Horror of Dracula (1958) - Rank 3.5/5

2009-11-13T16:09:00.000-08:00

Back on another "Hammer Films" bender, I decided to check out the film that allegedly sparked Christopher Lee's horror icon status (though he was in "Curse of Frankenstein" a year prior). While the film was entertaining, I was a bit let down by this rendition of Dracula. I think it's because I've had the image below burned into my mind since I was a child, peering at it on the back of VHS clam shells, expecting an awesome bit of vampiric badassery.

What I got was a laid back drama that made Tod Browning's 1931 version seem speedy. I'll assume that most folks are familiar with the Dracula tale, so discussing the plot here is decidedly unnecessary. An interesting alteration to the usual renditions is that the early portion of the film centers around Jonathan Harker's attempt to dupe the Count into believing that he is a librarian so that he can dispose of Dracula properly. But Dracula is wily, and Harker soon finds himself converted into a vampire. It's then up to Dr. Van Helsing (Peter Cushing) to eliminate Harker, explain, tactfully, to Harker's fiance, Lucy, that her beloved won't be coming back, and then dispose of Dracula.

To be honest, I think a major reason why the film crawled is the distinct absence of Dracula. You'd think that if you're pushing Lee as Dracula that he would get more screen time. But as it stands, Dracula is in the film for approximately ten minutes of the whole film and receives about a dozen lines. Therefore, images, such as the one above, are not indicative of the film as a whole. Pity.

Watch the Trailer

Day 270: Baxter (1989) - Rank 3.5/5

2009-11-10T18:03:00.000-08:00

After watching this film, it's likely that the most predominant thought rolling around in your nonplussed head is: "The French are fucked up." From Cocteau to Jeunet, the French have been trumping American cinema far longer than the Japanese. While they're the butt of countless "surrendering jokes," they undoubtedly have the last laugh when they see half of the movie screens in our country playing "Twilight." Well, in 1989, France also produced a film that was undoubtedly the answer to the talking animal indistry.

Don't act like you don't know what I speak of. Anthropomorphized animals have been popular since the dawn of Disney. Live action animal films are prime box office fare for toddlers with Kool-aid stained lips and their mothers who drag them in front of a screen in the desperate hope that a cat making butt-licking jokes will satiate her child's sugar-fueled insanity for ninety minutes. "Homeward Bound," "Benji," "Milo and Otis," "Beverly Hills Chihuahua," "Air Bud," "Cats Vs. Dogs"...the list goes on. "Baxter" is a film so atypical for the genre that it blows my mind.

Baxter is a cathartic bull terrier that dreams of having a master whose impulses mirror his own. Baxter enjoys refusing the compassion of his elderly owner and watching the young married couple across the street make love. Eventually he grows weary of his old crone caretaker and trips her on the steps, killing her. When another couple takes him in, he tries his best to make their newborn baby suffer a similar fate. Eventually, he ends up under the care of an aspiring neo-Nazi, who begins training Baxter to maim and kill his classmates. And Baxter is happy.

I love dark films, but this gets so heavy at times, I was left wondering if I genuinely enjoyed the film. I would liken "Baxter" with "Requieum for a Dream" when it comes to considering the film an enjoyable watch. Both titles are excellent, intriguing fare with moments of delightfully macabre humor, but they aren't films that demand frequent, repeat viewings.

Day 269: Mad Love (1935) - Rank 4/5

2009-11-10T17:41:00.000-08:00

Peter Lorre's first starring role, in Fritz Lang's astounding "M," no doubt left German filmgoers thinking, "Damn, that man's creepy." As Lorre's first American release film, the actor clearly wanted to make the same impression on an audience across the ocean. Certainly, his role as the genius surgeon, Dr. Gogol, could have easily been named Dr. Guignol for all of Lorre's bug-eyed brooding and nefarious scheming. The end result was Lorre became a permanent icon in horror just as Vincent Price did after his role in "House of Wax." While I can't speak for Lorre, I don't regard such typecasting with negativity. After all, if you're good at what you do, then why not exploit it.

Dr. Gogol is a classic, sympathetic villain. As is typically the case with such rogues, he's enraptured by the beauty of a stage actress, Yvonne. But the romance is not meant to be, for all his pining in the world cannot ruin her love for her husband, pianist Stephen Orlac. Ah, but when Dame Fate throws Orlac into a train accident, leaving his hands crushed, Yvonne has no other choice but to turn to her long-time admirer and brilliant surgeon, Dr. Gogol. Gogol gives Orlac hands that work, but they are the hands of a knife-throwing murderer, and when Orlac realizes this and begins to fear that those hands are developing a mind of their own, Gogol exploits this irrational fear in the hopes of driving Orlac mad and bringing him closer to Yvonne.

The "appendage gone awry" has been a plot contrivance for decades, but this might be the origin of the idea. Whether it is or not, it is one of the few times where it advances the plot rather than serving as the gimmick. As for Lorre, he sinks into the role of the tormented and scheming surgeon with glee, making "Mad Love" a refreshingly entertaining bit of classic horror.

Watch the Trailer

Day 268: Orpheus (1949) - Rank 4.5/5

2009-11-10T17:14:00.000-08:00

When it comes to films that can only be described as "dreamlike," Jean Cocteau's "Orpheus" is as hypnotic as "Eraserhead" is nightmarish. The story is entrancing and drenched with moments that are both eerie and beautiful. Even today, such a film would be considered avant-garde, so I can't help but wonder how mind-blowing it was sixty years ago.

While slightly more linear than other surrealist films, "Orpheus" still possesses enough of a disjointed plot to make a synopsis difficult. The tale is centralized around Orphée, a poet who witnesses a tragic accident and soon finds himself the target of affection for one of Death's close associates, Princess (Maria Casares). Princess takes Orphée's wife to the Underworld and Orphée retrieves her only to learn that he may never again look upon the face of his beloved for fear of losing her to Death forever.

Cocteau uses the Greek tragedy of Orpheus as his inspiration, but brings the tale into the modern day, using bikers as Death's reapers and the radio as a hellmouth for non-sequitur poetry. In addition, characters interacting with other characters on rear-projection screens, scenes filmed backwards and presented in reverse and other trick shots boggle the mind far more than current digital trickery. The result is a gorgeous slice of fantasmagoria that clearly laid the groundwork for the countless other surrealist filmmakers, such as David Lynch or Michel Gondry, that followed.

Day 267: My Best Fiend (1999) - Rank 4/5

2009-11-10T16:46:00.000-08:00

If I were to walk into my classroom tomorrow and ask my students to name a director and actor that frequently collaborate together, I'd probably find myself looking out across the same sea of blank stares that greet me every time I pose a query like "What function does a ribosome carry out in the cell?" Now, regardless of the question, there are those bastions of saving grace, and undoubtedly those few would respond: "Johnny Depp and Tim Burton." Go back and time ten years ago and ask me and you'd probably get: "Leo G. Carroll and Alfred Hitchcock," shortly before my ass is beaten for knowing too much about movies...by my mother. I kid. But for those who develop a penchant for what Werner Herzog has to offer, cinematically speaking, they soon learn that there is no duo more infamous than the German auteur and the rabid Klaus Kinski.

"My Best Fiend" is a dark, yet anecdotal documentary chronicling the foibles of the pair as they collaborated on one maddening production after the next. Herzog helms the project as he revisits some of the pivotal locations of his films, as if conducting a life journey. In a way, I don't suppose that description is far off. Herzog handles his subjects (himself and his deceased colleague) with more grace and tenderness than one might expect. It's as if the film is a partial vindication for the oft misunderstood Kinski.

Don't assume for a moment, though, that the production is laden with saccharine. Herzog recounts moments of Kinski's notorious temper, such as a two-day period where Kinski stayed locked in the lavatory and tore the room asunder. And, as one would assume, Herzog does retell (and clarify) the classic story of his alleged "directing by gun" on the set of "Aguirre: The Wrath of God." However, Herzog doesn't digress into the sensationalistic either. The documentary strikes perfect harmony between the gentle man and the anguished actor to instill the sense of awe for Kinski - a sense of awe that Herzog conveys that he, too, once felt for his past friend.

Watch the Trailer

Day 266: The Shout (1978) - Rank 4/5

2009-11-09T18:37:00.000-08:00

My fascination with Peter Weir's "Picnic at Hanging Rock" and "The Last Wave" drew me to this film. I never realized that there was a subgenre within Australian New Wave that focused on the juxtaposition of colonial "civilization" and aboriginal mystique. Thank goodness there is, because I have yet to be disappointed, and I can only hope there are other works that fall into this obscure category.

The film opens during a cricket match at an insame asylum (ah, if only more films began like that...), when a new doctor at the facility (Tim Curry) is invited to keep score alongside the eccentric inmate, Crossley (Alan Bates). Crossley decides that he wants to tell the new doctor a story behind one of the match's players, Anthony Fielding (John Hurt). Crossley's story involves his slow but steady integration (or should I say infiltration) into Fielding's life. Fielding, an effects artist making a study of various sounds, welcomes Crossley in one afternoon for lunch, and before he knows it, Crossley is showing up at the home every day and going as far as to have a blatant affair with Fieldin's wife (Susannah York). When Fielding becomes confrontational, Crossley threatens to use "the shout" on him - an aboriginal bit of magic that will kill any living thing that hears it.

The sequence where Crossley demonstrates his shout is fabulous. He and Fielding walk for hours to find a secluded environment, and even though Fielding plugs up his ears with cotton and wax, he slips into unconsciousness during the demonstration as sheep and birds drop dead all about him. But to assume that these mystical powers are real is to give Crossley the benefit of the doubt, especially when he's clearly an unreliable narrator. There is more than one moment in the film where the story (and Crossley's concentration) is interrupted by the cricket match. When the tale starts back up, minor elements have changed. The complexity of the characters and the battle of wits unfolding between them is enough to interpret as it is, but throw an element of incredibility into the mix, due to the unreliable nature of the storyteller, and you've got an engrossing and thought-provoking film that demands multiple viewings.

Watch the Trailer

Day 265: WALL-E (2008) - Rank 5/5

2009-11-07T16:37:00.000-08:00

I decided to take a break from all the murder, monsters and mayhem to indulge in a bit of Disneyfied treacle. So schmaltzy, in fact, that it even melted one of the many layers of ice covering my heart. There were also unconfirmed rumors that approximately one to two tears were seen in the vicinity of my eyes, though a lack of sufficient evidence has yet to yield any substantial conclusions.

Disney and Pixar rejoined forces to produce WALL-E, an anthropomorphic robot in the distant future. He spends every day cleaning up the trash-ridden world that was abandoned by humans centuries earlier. When a robot probe named EVE is sent in search of plant life, WALL-E is smitten and follows her across abandoned metropolises and space alike. WALL-E stows away on a survey ship that takes him to a giant cruiser that now holds the entire human race, and WALL-E soon becomes the target of the self-aware ship computer, for he possesses the one thing that would end the ship's tour of duty and return humans to Earth - a plant.

It's weird for me to think that all the cloying relationships in all the live action films in the world scarcely touch me, but when it comes to the animation medium, I'm a sucker. Perhaps its the melodramatic nature of the plots, or maybe it's just that the inner child in me is touched, leading to some bizarre, sentimental reaction. Either way, "WALL-E" is an endearing film that's positively gorgeous to behold and a testament that children's films can successfully appeal to and touch all ages if a solid script is there.

Watch the Trailer

Day 264: Curse of the Werewolf (1961) - Rank 4/5

2009-11-07T16:05:00.000-08:00

Oliver Reed as a werewolf? Don't mind if I do. Reed, a delightfully flamboyant actor who is prone to chewing the scenery, is in rare, subdued form in his first starring role. While playing characters of a brooding nature became is forte in life, Reed portrays Leon Corledo, a peasant afflicted with the curse of lycanthropy, with a quiet, but tortured, nature that makes you truly sympathize with the character.

The overall film feels very much like a fairy tale, albeit one far darker than you'd ever tell a child at bedtime. Beginning in 18th century Spain, roughly fifty years earlier, the story follows a poor beggar who comes to the town of Santa Vera in search of food and drink. He ends up at the castle of the cruel Marquis during his wedding feast. The Marquis provides the beggar with nothing but wine, and the result is drunken entertainment for all the guests until the beggar unwittingly offends the Marquis. Twenty years he lives in the dungeon for his offense, becoming more bestial by the year, until the fated day that he rapes the daughter of the dungeon master. She flees, is found half-dead and pregnant by Don Corledo, and is cared for by the Don and his wife until she dies during childbirth. The result is a child that possesses the spirit of the wolf within his blood. In reality, this probably isn't too far from the true origin for Oliver Reed (speculation based purely on the actor's rakish lifestyle).

Anyway, the werewolf being nothing more than a surreal metaphor for the beast that lies within every man is a unique twist to an old idea. It's explained during the film by a priest that every man possesses such a creature deep within his soul, but Leon's is far more prominent due to his past. His only hope is that he will find a woman who can tame that beast, and so he does in Cristina (Catherine Feller). But love is as cruel as Leon's past, and when he becomes separated from his love, the beast emerges and blood is shed.

The makeup for Reed as a werewolf is fantastic. The alteration of his neck and torso takes him beyond the look of a man with crepe hair slathered on his face. No, extra flesh added to Reed's large frame makes him look positively bestial and intimidating. This rendition, added to the macabre love story/fairy tale tone of the film, makes "Curse of the Werewolf" one of the superior installations in the lycanthrope lineage.

Watch the Trailer

Day 263: Faces (1968) - Rank 4.5/5

2009-11-07T09:26:00.000-08:00

"Faces" marks my first entry into John Cassavetes territory. My "film geek" friends that I consort with have attempted entry into this world before, but had lukewarm receptions to the avant-garde director's works. So I braced myself for boredom at worst and indifference at best, but was greeted with neither. Perhaps it's because I chose a film that none of my cronies had viewed, or maybe the simple explanation that Cassavetes is more my taste would be fitting, but I relished "Faces."

The film scarcely possesses the standard narrative that most cinematic works did in the late 1960's, and with a central focus on the topic of marital infidelity, it probably pushed some buttons too. It's a cinéma vérité collection of seven conversations/scenes, beginning with the end of a stint of "innocent debauchery" between businessman Richard Forst (John Marley) and prostitute Jeannie (Gena Rowlands). Richard goes home, informs his wife Maria (Lynn Carlin) that he wants a divorce, and that night, the former couple go their separate directions to find sexual happiness (Richard with Jeannie and Maria with a young hippie played by Seymour Cassel). But the more the individuals in this tale seek happiness and contentment, the more it eludes them.

The bleak analysis of the disintegration of marriage and conventional relationships in America is nothing short of hypnotic. The performances of each character range from manic to introspective and it's easy to see how Cassel and Carlin both snagged Oscar nominations for their performances. I was surprised that John Marley was not nominated though. Marley spent most of his career playing bit parts and this feels like the proverbial "role of a lifetime" for him. He certainly puts his heart into it as if it is. Without the performances of the film's four major players, the impact of "Faces" would have easily been lost, but as it stands, John Cassavetes' commentary on social dynamics in America stands out as a wonderful piece of art.

Watch the Trailer

Day 262: Brides of Dracula (1960) - Rank 4/5

2009-11-07T09:25:00.000-08:00

Over the years, Dr. Van Helsing has undergone as many permutations as Dracula. In Tod Browning's adaptation, Dr. Van Helsing is played with scholarly finesse by an aged Edward Van Sloan. Anthony Hopkins portrayed the doctor in Coppola's adaptation as an eccentric, dancing the fine line between insanity and brilliance. Jack Gwillim devoured the scenery as the vampire hunter during his brief role in "The Monster Squad." Hugh Jackman...um...no. But when it comes to Peter Cushing, I believe my friend Dave put it best when he said, "It's a Van Helsing you can root for." Cushing's Van Helsing is an action hero who relies on his intellect, reminiscent of Indiana Jones.

"Brides of Dracula" follows where "Horror of Dracula" left off. Dracula is dead, but his legacy continues through the Baron Meinster. The baron has been imprisoned for most of his life by his mother, the Baroness (Martita Hunt). But when young Marienne visits the castle, she takes pity and unlocks the Baron. The result is a trail of female corpses that later rise as vampires and take their place by the Baron's side. But as fate would have it, Van Helsing is in town and has no qualms about killing women.

Cushing is absolutely delightful, and Hunt is equally enjoyable, casting an impression of both elegance and impending doom whenever she appears on screen. The film also features a sequence where Van Helsing is bit and must overcome this obstacle if he's to defeat the Baron. I won't mention the outcome, but needless to say, it's the first time I've regarded Peter Cushing as a badass.

Watch the Trailer

Day 261: Vampire Circus (1972) - Rank 4.5/5

2009-11-07T09:20:00.000-08:00

Before the credits even roll, you're treated to the pedophilic killing of a waif by a vampire, ample tit shots and sex, followed by the gory disposal of said vampire at the hands of an angry mob. Such moments in film enkindle the inner thirteen year-old in me, resulting in a tiny voice at the back of my mind that need exclaim only one thing: "Cooooooool!" "Vampire Circus" can't be considered anything but a guilty pleasure film, but, ah, what a guilty pleasure at that.

The plot could best be summed up as: an adaptation of Ray Bradbury's "Something Wicked This Way Comes"...but with vampires. Count Mitterhouse is the bourgeoisie vampire that is slain prior to the film's titles, and upon his death, he claims that a plague will fall upon the residents of the village as punishment, and that he will, one day, be resurrected by the blood of those who took his life. The plague does come and soon the village is cut off from the world, like a lot of lepers, so you can imagine their glee when the circus comes to town (the term "circus" being used here, since "band of gypsies" would be more apt a description). Every night, the town's population is entertained by the metamorphosis of animals to man, hypnotic dances and other manners of black magic presented in a merry fashion.

I suppose the film could also be compared with "The Circus of Dr. Lao," for many elements of the circus lead to the demise of the original slayers of Count Mitterhouse in mildly ironic fashions, just as foolish patrons meet unexpected fates at the hands of Medusa or other creatures with Dr. Lao's show. The film is both dark and surreal, and it still pushes the envelope by today's standards (much less, by those of Britain in the early 1970's). Definitely a lot of fun!

Watch the Trailer

Day 260: Inglorious Basterds (2009) - Rank 5/5

2009-11-05T16:44:00.000-08:00

It could be argued that the film's are nothing more than cinematic masturbation on the director's part. He takes the kitchy elements of the film genres he digs (blaxploitation, kung fu, spaghetti westerns, etc), pumps them full of steroidal violence and ties up his sequences of cruelty with dialogue that often feels to clever for its own good. But I'll be damned if this predictable and self-serving form of showmanship fails to entertain.

The story is centered around a pack of Jewish-American soldiers who are sent behind enemy lines to pick off as many Nazis as they can. The men accept this mission, headed by Lieutenant Raine (Brad Pitt), and together they terrorize the French countryside, torturing and scalping Germans with utter glee. In a parallel tale, Shosanna Dreyfus, the owner of a French cinema, will be welcoming the Nazi elite to her theatre for the premiere of Joseph Goebbels latest propaganda film. Unbeknownst to the Germans, she plans to burn down the theatre on the night of the premiere. Both missions inexorably begin to converge, but are also threatened by the actions of a sly S.S. officer, who is known for his Jew-killing revelry.

Now, before I say this, please keep in mind that I love the "Kill Bill" saga, as well as "Pulp Fiction," but "Inglorious Basterds" has will undoubtedly assume the rank of "favorite Tarantino film" in my mind. It's one of the director's more accessible films to the general public, yet it also regresses into one of the most violent climaxes I've ever seen; it was a moment that made me realized that Tarantino has become the new Ken Russell where excess for the sake of excess is concerned. One forewarning though - I was thrown off by my misconceptions as to what could happen based on history and found myself pondering how the film would accommodate itself to reality. Keep in mind that Tarantino's film brings only two words to mind: "Fuck history!"

Watch the Trailer

Day 259: Captain Kronos - Vampire Hunter (1974) - Rank 4.5/5

2009-11-05T16:16:00.000-08:00

Just a forewarning - this marks the beginning of a very long, Hammer Studios binge on my part. The decision has come about out of a passion for horror films, stemming from the classic monsters (Wolfman, Frankenstein's monster, Dracula, etc). However, while the legacy set forth by Universal Studios is certainly the most prominent in the minds of many when it comes to the cinematic interpretations of these fictional creatures, Hammer Studios also invested a great deal of its time and money into these franchises. Many received more sequels than the Universal monsters ever did, yet I've managed to only see a handful of those in my lifetime. With the exception of "Curse of Frankenstein" and "Revenge of Frankenstein," I haven't seen most of the quintessential films the studio put out. My tastes have always been aimed at their more offbeat sagas ("X: The Unknown," "Quatermass and the Pit," "Four-Sided Triangle," etc.). Therefore, I felt the need to amend this sorely neglected aspect of my horror knowledge, and in starting with "Captain Kronos," I certainly kicked things off right.

"Captain Kronos" is an exceptionally unique film for a couple of major reasons. The first is it is an atypical "horror" film, bridging the gap between horror and action. It blends swashbuckling braggadocio with Gothic brooding in perfect harmony. Kronos (Horst Janson) is a nomadic vampire hunter, whose only close friend is a hunchbacked doctor named Professor Krost. They arrive at a village where virginal lasses are being drained of their life essence left and right.

The other unique twist to the tale is that it has a new take on the vampire legend. Krost and Kronos explain to the villagers that there are different breeds of vampire, just as there are great varieties of fish or bird. The notion that vampires can only come out at night and drain blood from the neck is an antiquated one to Kronos. The vampires plaguing the town feed only on the youth of girls, draining it from their lips during broad daylight. I thought this was delightfully refreshing, especially considering that vampires are often weaker than humans in the sense that they are not immune to sunlight, running water, garlic, crucifixes, etc.

There's one fabulous sequence where the town doctor begins to show signs of vampirism and Kronos begins experimenting with different means to killing the doctor in order to understand the lineage of vampire's he's fighting a little more. Stake through the heart - no dice. Hanging, flame - no good. But steel...Ah, that does it. So Kronos absconds with a large cross from a cemetery and Krost tempers it down to a sword for Kronos to use in battling the youth-draining vampires. What more can I say really? A lot of action and a lot of fun all around.

Watch the Trailer

Day 258: She-Wolf of London (1946) - Rank 2/5

2009-11-04T19:03:00.000-08:00

For all intents and purposes, a good werewolf flick should not have me tapping at my foot, wondering how much longer it has. Especially when that film is scarcely over an hour. Ah, but such was the case with "She-Wolf of London" - a film that struggled to work lycanthropy into its plot. Phyllis Allenby (June Lockhart) worries that she's a werewolf when a series of murders begins in the park adjacent to her estate. She comes up with this notion with the help of her eccentric Aunt Martha, who believes there's a curse tied to the family. As a result, Phyllis descends into a private reverie of madness, severing her ties with the man she loves. Ah, but he's the dedicated sort and he strives to crack the mystery.

While there are moments of fair suspense and mystery, the majority of the film comes off as what it truly is: quick, low-budget fare. Lockhart, along with her fellow cast members (Don Porter, Sara Haden) seem to be doing their best with the material available. The problem is that the screenplay is rather flat. So much so that I find myself struggling to find something noteworthy about the film worth adding to what I've already said. I cannot, so there you have it.

Watch the Trailer

Day 257: Hitcher II: I've Been Waiting For You - Rank 2.5/5

2009-11-04T18:29:00.000-08:00

"The Hitcher." What a weird film to choose for a straight-to-DVD sequel. "The Hitcher" is a fairly obscure title as it is, and it's certainly not like it raked in a ton of dough. Not only that, but the original was also a film that not only required a great suspension of disbelief - it necessitated taking your disbelief, packing it in a box and shipping it across country (though, admittedly, "The Hitcher" is a guilty pleasure for me). And yet, here we are.

The sequel is entertaining enough, though it has two strikes against it. First, it requires an even greater suspension of disbelief than the original, which I can live with. But, that brings me to strike number two: Jake Busey is no Rutger Hauer. Hauer was positively intimidating in the first film. You had no doubt he was a serial killer (in either the film or real life for that matter). Busey? Not so much. He waltzes through the film with a puckish glee that seems uncharacteristic of the "Hitcher" character.

The premise is that he is the reincarnation of the devil that C. Thomas Howell's Jim Halsey was plagued by twenty years earlier. Howell returns as his character, along Kari Wuhrer as his fiance. Howell serves as a source of exposition (though unnecessarily so - after all, how many folks who have never heard of "The Hitcher" are going to buy a copy of "Hitcher II?") as well as a reason for the pair to end up back in Texas as he hopes to resolve the inner turmoil that's been plaguing him for the past two decades. After that, he's promptly killed and soon Wurher is pitted against Busey's "Hitcher." The film is mildly entertaining, but to me, all it truly accomplished was putting me in the mood to rewatch the original again.

Day 256: Splinter (2008) - Rank 3/5

2009-09-21T17:20:00.000-07:00

This film falls into the loose category that so many modern horror films do - cool concept that doesn't live up to its potential. The creature that must be defeated in this film is not a monster in a true sense, but a fungus that infects living humans. The fungus grows in the form of metallic spikes and it only takes a puncture of one thin shard to infect you. Once that occurs, your body is no longer your own - your central nervous system is controlled by the primitive demands of the fungus, converting bodies, both living and dead, into unthinking, mobile creatures.

The humans pitted against this organisms are a happy couple celebrating their love with a camping trip, and another couple who hijack their car and take them hostage. The four end up at a gas station where the attendant has been infected by the fungus and soon they're holed up in this small station a la every zombie film ever made. The story conducts itself in a manner that can only be described as "predictable implausibility." A man's arm is amputated in a manner cruder than a scene in any "Saw" film, yet the victim lives, police show up randomly only to be destroyed...the usual cliches.

I can't deny though, that the creature concept was pretty cool. The fungus had the ability to join with itself and there's a neat scene where two corpses are joined by the splintering substance into one. Regrettably, you never see much of it, but a cool concept all the same. Severed limbs also serve the same threat as full corpses since the fungus can control all! There are some pretty cool special effects for such a low-budget film, but unfortunately "shaky-camera cinematography" was utilized in action scenes to prevent you from seeing too much (a tactic used to its fullest by Ridley Scott in "Gladiator" as well as every filmmaker since who didn't want the audience to get a genuine look at the action taking place...tsk, tsk). It wasn't the most unique horror flick, but I've killed time with far worse fodder.

Watch the Trailer

Day 255: The Premature Burial (1962) - Rank 3/5

2009-09-20T13:55:00.000-07:00

Roger Corman's adaptations of Edgar Allan Poe pieces hold a fond place in my heart, for I have early memories of "Pit and the Pendulum" from my youth that later led to a rabid search for the rest of Vincent Price's collaborations with the B-movie auteur. "Tomb of Ligeia" and "Masque of the Red Death" are masterpieces of the macabre, despite limited budgets. But I was hesitant about catching "The Premature Burial" for in place of Vincent Price, we are handed Ray Milland as the tortured soul. My instincts were correct, for Milland scarcely has the "Gothic presence" of Price.

Milland is certainly capable of playing a tormented protagonist - his Oscar for "The Lost Weekend" is a testament to that fact. He can even "excel" at B-grade horror as his next collaboration with Roger Corman, "X: The Man with X-Ray Eyes" demonstrates. But the script doesn't seem to suit him in this situation. In fact, the script is the weakest aspect of the film. After all, there are only so many scenarios where a paralyzing fear of being buried alive can have a genuine influence on a man. Sure, all of Corman's Poe films are contrived to a degree, but not to the point that it mars the credibility of the lead (the "twist" ending is positively absurd, as well). So I suppose that Milland does his best playing Guy Carrell, an English nobleman who makes it his life's obsession ensuring that he will never be buried alive.

There is nice atmosphere to the film, evoking the same mood that the better installments generated. The repetition of "Molly Malone" being whistled in a haunting manner was a nice touch. Whistling is one of those small touches that can add great senses of suspense or dread and so often it's used in films as more of a whimsical element. "M," "Horror Express" and "Kill Bill Volume 1" all have moments where the eerie whistle of a character adds to the mood in a manner similar to "The Premature Burial." Also, my hats off to the brilliance of character Alan Napier, who was employed to play Milland's father-in-law. During the wedding scene at the film's start, a side character asks Napier if he is enjoying his daughter's wedding. He replies that he no longer experiences enjoyment - "...rather, I just experience greater and lesser degrees of tedium." A fabulous line that had me rolling.

Watch the Trailer

Day 254: Withnail & I (1986) - Rank 5/5

2009-09-20T13:54:00.000-07:00

It's rare for me to watch a comedy and find myself laughing to the extent that my own chortles drown out the dialog on screen, but it happens. Such was the case with this British take on Gonzo reality. I suppose that referring to it as Gonzo might conjure up too much of a "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" image, though there are elements of that vacationing, hallucinatory madness afoot. It was more of a "self-realization" film, focused on a character coming to terms with who he is and where his direction in life lies just a bit later than many of his peers did (a theme that a somewhat similar film, "SLC Punk," handled rather well.

Our unnamed narrator and his rakish compatriot, Withnail, decide that the drudgery of their drug-addled, day-to-day lives needs shaking up, so they decide to escape deep into the pasture lands of rural England to indulge in drugs. But the kink in the works is the owner of their scenic cottage - Withnail's uncle, a flamboyant, retired actor who absolutely adores the narrator. So when Withnail's uncle "accidentally" ends up at the cottage as well, the old codger sets his sites on conquering the young vacationer.

Richard Griffiths, hands down, makes this movie. He seems to revel in the eccentric and licentious behavior of Uncle Monty. His constant attempts at seducing the narrator had me, for lack of a better word, howling with laughter. There are moments of subtle, euphemistic humor, such as asking the narrator if he is adept at handling meat while preparing a meal, to scenes of attempted rape as Uncle Monty drunkenly bashes down a barricaded door, bellowing "Boy! Don't pretend to sleep, boy! I know you're awake and I'll have you yet!" Richard E. Grant and Paul McGann have an entertaining, bickering friendship that has its surreal moments, but never seems to push the limits of reality. And despite moments as low as drinking lighter fluid, the two are endearing, giving a humorous look at the drug culture of the late sixties a heartwarming touch.

Watch the Trailer

Day 253: Family Plot (1976) - Rank 4/5

2009-09-20T13:50:00.000-07:00

I'd heard a fair amount of mediocre reviews regarding Hitchcock's last film prior to watching it. Perhaps lowering my expectations is why I enjoyed the silly caper. The story doesn't have the evocative power of "Vertigo" or "Rebecca," nor does it possess the edge-of-your-seat suspense of "Rear Window" or "Psycho." No, if I had to liken it to some of the director's other works, I'd say that it's definitely commensurate with "The Trouble With Harry" and possibly the zanier aspects of "North By Northwest."

The story is centered around the hijinks of a fraudulent psychic, Blanche (Barbara Harris) and her boyfriend (Bruce Dern) as they accept a commission from one of Blanche's regular clients - a wealthy, old widower. The assignment is to locate the widow's long-lost son so she can will her fortune to him. The problem? The heir (William Devane) doesn't want to be found, because his past is marred with murder and kidnapping. Needless to say, Blanche and her man stumble into a mess of trouble typical of most Hitchcock protagonists.

Despite some dark undertones, the film is, on the whole, light fare. Harris and Dern have entertaining chemistry on screen. William Devane channels Paul Lynde channeling William Devane as only Devane can. Karen Black does her multiple roles schtick that put her on the map in "Trilogy of Terror." How she can dupe others with her false identity with those eyes is a mystery to me and a mystery worthy of Hitchcock. Perhaps that could be his next proj...oh............ooooooh.
Watch the Trailer

Day 252: The Faculty (1998) - Rank 4/5

2009-09-20T13:49:00.000-07:00

Here's my plan if I should ever get a time machine - I would travel back in time and pick up some Crystal Pepsi and Barbeque Ripplins and catch "Dick Tracy" in theatres. That's it. I've seen too many sci-fi films that to be so foolish as to pull a "Sound of Thunder" move and do something so consequential as talk to my former self. However, if I did, I would smack my seventeen year-old self upside the head in 1998 and say "Go watch 'The Faculty,' damn it!" When the film came out, I shunned anything put out by Dimension because I was too busy absorbing myself in Kubrick and Vincent Price horror flicks. I was too snobbish to indulge in modern horror aimed only at my demographic.

It's a pity, though, for not only is this a damn, fun film, but it was released during my senior year, which was perfect timing. Of course, the big reason that "The Faculty" rises above the rest of its kind from the era ("Scream," "I Know What You Did Last Summer," etc.) is that it was helmed by Robert Rodriguez, who knows what it takes to entertain, whether he's directing a bloodbath or a children's film. The storyline is a touch "Invasion of the Body Snatchers," a touch "Night of the Creeps," and there are even elements of Bruce Coville's literary niche present. Nothing complex, mind you - the film is as surface-level as it seems. The school's teacher base is turning into aliens and it's up to a rag-tag group of students to stop them.

The student leads aren't terrible, but they don't stand out either, which is why the majority of them (apart from Elijah Wood and Josh Hartnett) have disappeared from the face of the Earth. The adult cast is another situation entirely, made up of a veritable character actor orgy. Daniel Von Bargen, Jon Stewart, Famke Janssen, Salma Hayek, Piper Laurie, Bebe Neuwirth, Susan Willis, Robert Patrick and a Harry Knowles cameo really do make the film. The rest of the film could have been an exercise in mediocrity and that cast would make it fun. Thankfully, the movie works on a lot of other levels (though, like most films of this ilk, it does have its fair share of gross implausibilities).
Watch the Trailer

Day 251: The Savage Messiah (1972) - Rank 4.5/5

2009-09-20T13:47:00.000-07:00

Finally, a contrived film concept is executed in a manner that works. The overused plot? Two individuals, too eccentric for their own good, find love and friendship in one another through the very fact that they're enamored by one another's foibles. It's a staple synopsis of romantic comedies, dating back to the squirrely comedies of the thirties and forties, such as "Bringing Up Baby" to modern permutations like "Annie Hall" or my recently reviewed "Benny and Joon."

It's tough to say what makes this film work so well. One element is certainly the direction of Ken Russell, though his trademark excess is rather subdued here, replaced by the rakish nature of his main characters. Perhaps his focus on character development over surreal, visual digressions is a plus. The script is excellent and the performances by the leads are top notch. Scott Antony conveys a dizzying energy as Henri Gaudier, an obscure French sculptor who serves as Russell's focus in the biopic. Dorothy Tutin is equally incendiary as Henri's love and partner, Sophie.

The basic plot is quite similar to Russell's other biopics ("Mahler," "The Music Lovers," etc.), placing the focus on the subject dance along the fine line between genius and insanity. But while he portrays Gaudier as a wild, callous and egotistic artist, you're still fascinated by the talent he effortlessly exudes. For example, early in the film, Gaudier suggests an art dealer drop by his studio, bragging about a new, nonexistent piece of sculpture he has lying about. The dealer calls his bluff and promises to visit early in the morning. Gaudier leaves the party, absconds with a marble tombstone from a local cemetery and carves it into a beautiful work overnight, amidst his self-proclaiming ramblings. When the dealer cancels his meeting the next morning, Gaudier casts his new sculpture through the gallery's plate glass window. Antony almost seems to be channeling Michael Palin at times in his performance, but never to an obnoxious degree. I was surprised to learn, after a bit of research, that he was featured in a couple of minor roles after this film ("Savage Messiah" being his first performance), did a bit of stage work and disappeared. It's a shame, considering the potential demonstrated on screen. But speaking of stunning performances, Helen Mirren costars and is naked for approximately half of her screen time. Perhaps that's why I found the film so enjoyable...

Day 250: House of Dracula (1945) - Rank 3.5/5

2009-09-20T13:46:00.000-07:00

Lycanthropy, vampirism, reanimated corpses, hunchbacked dames and insanity...all these things were what lured me into the science field as a youth. I suppose I was no different than the standard six year-old that aspires to be a cowboy or astronaut when he grows up. It's just that my doe-eyed dreams involved me becoming a mad scientist. Regrettably, there are no institutes of higher learning that offer degrees in delirium with minors in biology (unless you count the Word of Life Bible Institute's creationism program - Hey-oh!).

Here's a film that delivers a promise more golden and misleading than any of the other horror fodder I enjoyed as a youth. Dr. Edelmann is a scientist researching fungi in a Gothic castle with his saucy, hunchbacked nurse, when Dracula (David Carridine) arrives and reveals to the doctor that he's been slumbering in the castle's secret crypt. Dracula wants to be cured and Edelmann sets off to find one. Shortly thereafter, Larry Talbot (Lon Chaney Jr.) is captured by the police and turns into a werewolf in his jail cell. Edelmann asks if he can have him, much as a child would ask for a puppy in a store window, and the police agree. After the third night, while trying to cure Larry with the help of the villager hoard (headed by Skelton Knaggs), Edelmann discovers the Frankenstein monster in a series of cove caves, which just so happen to connect to his recently-discovered crypt. And then he goes insane.

The ludicrous nature of this all makes this film quite fun. Old Doc Edelmann has to be thinking "Holy shit! Pay dirt!" when he goes from the banal study of fungal spores to having a vampire, wolfman and a reanimated corpse all inside of his castle walls (which also have a crypt and catacombs) in less than 72 hours. Too bad he goes insane. Bound to happen, I suppose. I do have to mention that one of the best "Dracula moments" in any of the Universal installations takes place when Dracula approaches Edelmann's assistant (Martha O'Driscoll) as she plays the piano. He begins to stare at her ominously, and soon she finds herself playing a haunting piece of music unknown to her. Eerie, yet effective. I was actually surprised that I enjoyed this better than the prior installment, "Son of Dracula." My assessment is that "Son of Dracula's" greatest fault is that it took itself too seriously, a quality that "House of Dracula" thankfully never strives for.

Watch the Trailer

Day 249: Master of the Flying Guillotine (1974) - Rank 3.5/5

2009-09-20T13:45:00.000-07:00

It's Mortal Kombat: the Movie before "Mortal Kombat" was ever born! Flying weapons and over-the-top fight sequences galore, this is both a quintessential martial arts flick as well as a nice, little guilty pleasure. To make logical heads or tails of the plot is an exercise in futility, but being a school teacher by second trade, I excel at executing frivolity.

A blind assassin is bound and determined to vanquish his sworn enemy, the one-armed boxer who killed his followers. The assassin hones his skills by killing every one-armed man he happens across, utilizing the weapon that you know is coming...the FLYING GUILLOTINE! In one swift move, an opponent is beheaded, leaving the master of the weapon to revel at your decapitated body...assuming he could see it. The one-armed boxer, who's now running a martial arts school, spearheads a fighting tournament in the hopes of flushing out the assassin. Several eccentric fighters later, including one whose arms possess "Stretch Armstrong" powers, the blind killer shows himself.

It's clear that this was one of the prime pieces of cult fodder that influenced Tarantino's creation of the "Kill Bill" saga - so much so that he even uses excerpts from the theme music during "Volume One." The film possesses none of the grace and complex story lines that modern masterpieces, such as "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon," or "Hero," do. But rest assured that there's enough absurdity to satiate your inner ten year-old.

Watch the Trailer