Day 256: Splinter (2008) - Rank 3/5

This film falls into the loose category that so many modern horror films do - cool concept that doesn't live up to its potential. The creature that must be defeated in this film is not a monster in a true sense, but a fungus that infects living humans. The fungus grows in the form of metallic spikes and it only takes a puncture of one thin shard to infect you. Once that occurs, your body is no longer your own - your central nervous system is controlled by the primitive demands of the fungus, converting bodies, both living and dead, into unthinking, mobile creatures.

The humans pitted against this organisms are a happy couple celebrating their love with a camping trip, and another couple who hijack their car and take them hostage. The four end up at a gas station where the attendant has been infected by the fungus and soon they're holed up in this small station a la every zombie film ever made. The story conducts itself in a manner that can only be described as "predictable implausibility." A man's arm is amputated in a manner cruder than a scene in any "Saw" film, yet the victim lives, police show up randomly only to be destroyed...the usual cliches.

I can't deny though, that the creature concept was pretty cool. The fungus had the ability to join with itself and there's a neat scene where two corpses are joined by the splintering substance into one. Regrettably, you never see much of it, but a cool concept all the same. Severed limbs also serve the same threat as full corpses since the fungus can control all! There are some pretty cool special effects for such a low-budget film, but unfortunately "shaky-camera cinematography" was utilized in action scenes to prevent you from seeing too much (a tactic used to its fullest by Ridley Scott in "Gladiator" as well as every filmmaker since who didn't want the audience to get a genuine look at the action taking place...tsk, tsk). It wasn't the most unique horror flick, but I've killed time with far worse fodder.


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Day 255: The Premature Burial (1962) - Rank 3/5

Roger Corman's adaptations of Edgar Allan Poe pieces hold a fond place in my heart, for I have early memories of "Pit and the Pendulum" from my youth that later led to a rabid search for the rest of Vincent Price's collaborations with the B-movie auteur. "Tomb of Ligeia" and "Masque of the Red Death" are masterpieces of the macabre, despite limited budgets. But I was hesitant about catching "The Premature Burial" for in place of Vincent Price, we are handed Ray Milland as the tortured soul. My instincts were correct, for Milland scarcely has the "Gothic presence" of Price.

Milland is certainly capable of playing a tormented protagonist - his Oscar for "The Lost Weekend" is a testament to that fact. He can even "excel" at B-grade horror as his next collaboration with Roger Corman, "X: The Man with X-Ray Eyes" demonstrates. But the script doesn't seem to suit him in this situation. In fact, the script is the weakest aspect of the film. After all, there are only so many scenarios where a paralyzing fear of being buried alive can have a genuine influence on a man. Sure, all of Corman's Poe films are contrived to a degree, but not to the point that it mars the credibility of the lead (the "twist" ending is positively absurd, as well). So I suppose that Milland does his best playing Guy Carrell, an English nobleman who makes it his life's obsession ensuring that he will never be buried alive.

There is nice atmosphere to the film, evoking the same mood that the better installments generated. The repetition of "Molly Malone" being whistled in a haunting manner was a nice touch. Whistling is one of those small touches that can add great senses of suspense or dread and so often it's used in films as more of a whimsical element. "M," "Horror Express" and "Kill Bill Volume 1" all have moments where the eerie whistle of a character adds to the mood in a manner similar to "The Premature Burial." Also, my hats off to the brilliance of character Alan Napier, who was employed to play Milland's father-in-law. During the wedding scene at the film's start, a side character asks Napier if he is enjoying his daughter's wedding. He replies that he no longer experiences enjoyment - "...rather, I just experience greater and lesser degrees of tedium." A fabulous line that had me rolling.

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Day 254: Withnail & I (1986) - Rank 5/5

It's rare for me to watch a comedy and find myself laughing to the extent that my own chortles drown out the dialog on screen, but it happens. Such was the case with this British take on Gonzo reality. I suppose that referring to it as Gonzo might conjure up too much of a "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" image, though there are elements of that vacationing, hallucinatory madness afoot. It was more of a "self-realization" film, focused on a character coming to terms with who he is and where his direction in life lies just a bit later than many of his peers did (a theme that a somewhat similar film, "SLC Punk," handled rather well.

Our unnamed narrator and his rakish compatriot, Withnail, decide that the drudgery of their drug-addled, day-to-day lives needs shaking up, so they decide to escape deep into the pasture lands of rural England to indulge in drugs. But the kink in the works is the owner of their scenic cottage - Withnail's uncle, a flamboyant, retired actor who absolutely adores the narrator. So when Withnail's uncle "accidentally" ends up at the cottage as well, the old codger sets his sites on conquering the young vacationer.

Richard Griffiths, hands down, makes this movie. He seems to revel in the eccentric and licentious behavior of Uncle Monty. His constant attempts at seducing the narrator had me, for lack of a better word, howling with laughter. There are moments of subtle, euphemistic humor, such as asking the narrator if he is adept at handling meat while preparing a meal, to scenes of attempted rape as Uncle Monty drunkenly bashes down a barricaded door, bellowing "Boy! Don't pretend to sleep, boy! I know you're awake and I'll have you yet!" Richard E. Grant and Paul McGann have an entertaining, bickering friendship that has its surreal moments, but never seems to push the limits of reality. And despite moments as low as drinking lighter fluid, the two are endearing, giving a humorous look at the drug culture of the late sixties a heartwarming touch.


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Day 253: Family Plot (1976) - Rank 4/5

I'd heard a fair amount of mediocre reviews regarding Hitchcock's last film prior to watching it. Perhaps lowering my expectations is why I enjoyed the silly caper. The story doesn't have the evocative power of "Vertigo" or "Rebecca," nor does it possess the edge-of-your-seat suspense of "Rear Window" or "Psycho." No, if I had to liken it to some of the director's other works, I'd say that it's definitely commensurate with "The Trouble With Harry" and possibly the zanier aspects of "North By Northwest."

The story is centered around the hijinks of a fraudulent psychic, Blanche (Barbara Harris) and her boyfriend (Bruce Dern) as they accept a commission from one of Blanche's regular clients - a wealthy, old widower. The assignment is to locate the widow's long-lost son so she can will her fortune to him. The problem? The heir (William Devane) doesn't want to be found, because his past is marred with murder and kidnapping. Needless to say, Blanche and her man stumble into a mess of trouble typical of most Hitchcock protagonists.

Despite some dark undertones, the film is, on the whole, light fare. Harris and Dern have entertaining chemistry on screen. William Devane channels Paul Lynde channeling William Devane as only Devane can. Karen Black does her multiple roles schtick that put her on the map in "Trilogy of Terror." How she can dupe others with her false identity with those eyes is a mystery to me and a mystery worthy of Hitchcock. Perhaps that could be his next proj...oh............ooooooh.
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Day 252: The Faculty (1998) - Rank 4/5

Here's my plan if I should ever get a time machine - I would travel back in time and pick up some Crystal Pepsi and Barbeque Ripplins and catch "Dick Tracy" in theatres. That's it. I've seen too many sci-fi films that to be so foolish as to pull a "Sound of Thunder" move and do something so consequential as talk to my former self. However, if I did, I would smack my seventeen year-old self upside the head in 1998 and say "Go watch 'The Faculty,' damn it!" When the film came out, I shunned anything put out by Dimension because I was too busy absorbing myself in Kubrick and Vincent Price horror flicks. I was too snobbish to indulge in modern horror aimed only at my demographic.

It's a pity, though, for not only is this a damn, fun film, but it was released during my senior year, which was perfect timing. Of course, the big reason that "The Faculty" rises above the rest of its kind from the era ("Scream," "I Know What You Did Last Summer," etc.) is that it was helmed by Robert Rodriguez, who knows what it takes to entertain, whether he's directing a bloodbath or a children's film. The storyline is a touch "Invasion of the Body Snatchers," a touch "Night of the Creeps," and there are even elements of Bruce Coville's literary niche present. Nothing complex, mind you - the film is as surface-level as it seems. The school's teacher base is turning into aliens and it's up to a rag-tag group of students to stop them.

The student leads aren't terrible, but they don't stand out either, which is why the majority of them (apart from Elijah Wood and Josh Hartnett) have disappeared from the face of the Earth. The adult cast is another situation entirely, made up of a veritable character actor orgy. Daniel Von Bargen, Jon Stewart, Famke Janssen, Salma Hayek, Piper Laurie, Bebe Neuwirth, Susan Willis, Robert Patrick and a Harry Knowles cameo really do make the film. The rest of the film could have been an exercise in mediocrity and that cast would make it fun. Thankfully, the movie works on a lot of other levels (though, like most films of this ilk, it does have its fair share of gross implausibilities).
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Day 251: The Savage Messiah (1972) - Rank 4.5/5

Finally, a contrived film concept is executed in a manner that works. The overused plot? Two individuals, too eccentric for their own good, find love and friendship in one another through the very fact that they're enamored by one another's foibles. It's a staple synopsis of romantic comedies, dating back to the squirrely comedies of the thirties and forties, such as "Bringing Up Baby" to modern permutations like "Annie Hall" or my recently reviewed "Benny and Joon."

It's tough to say what makes this film work so well. One element is certainly the direction of Ken Russell, though his trademark excess is rather subdued here, replaced by the rakish nature of his main characters. Perhaps his focus on character development over surreal, visual digressions is a plus. The script is excellent and the performances by the leads are top notch. Scott Antony conveys a dizzying energy as Henri Gaudier, an obscure French sculptor who serves as Russell's focus in the biopic. Dorothy Tutin is equally incendiary as Henri's love and partner, Sophie.

The basic plot is quite similar to Russell's other biopics ("Mahler," "The Music Lovers," etc.), placing the focus on the subject dance along the fine line between genius and insanity. But while he portrays Gaudier as a wild, callous and egotistic artist, you're still fascinated by the talent he effortlessly exudes. For example, early in the film, Gaudier suggests an art dealer drop by his studio, bragging about a new, nonexistent piece of sculpture he has lying about. The dealer calls his bluff and promises to visit early in the morning. Gaudier leaves the party, absconds with a marble tombstone from a local cemetery and carves it into a beautiful work overnight, amidst his self-proclaiming ramblings. When the dealer cancels his meeting the next morning, Gaudier casts his new sculpture through the gallery's plate glass window. Antony almost seems to be channeling Michael Palin at times in his performance, but never to an obnoxious degree. I was surprised to learn, after a bit of research, that he was featured in a couple of minor roles after this film ("Savage Messiah" being his first performance), did a bit of stage work and disappeared. It's a shame, considering the potential demonstrated on screen. But speaking of stunning performances, Helen Mirren costars and is naked for approximately half of her screen time. Perhaps that's why I found the film so enjoyable...

Day 250: House of Dracula (1945) - Rank 3.5/5

Lycanthropy, vampirism, reanimated corpses, hunchbacked dames and insanity...all these things were what lured me into the science field as a youth. I suppose I was no different than the standard six year-old that aspires to be a cowboy or astronaut when he grows up. It's just that my doe-eyed dreams involved me becoming a mad scientist. Regrettably, there are no institutes of higher learning that offer degrees in delirium with minors in biology (unless you count the Word of Life Bible Institute's creationism program - Hey-oh!).

Here's a film that delivers a promise more golden and misleading than any of the other horror fodder I enjoyed as a youth. Dr. Edelmann is a scientist researching fungi in a Gothic castle with his saucy, hunchbacked nurse, when Dracula (David Carridine) arrives and reveals to the doctor that he's been slumbering in the castle's secret crypt. Dracula wants to be cured and Edelmann sets off to find one. Shortly thereafter, Larry Talbot (Lon Chaney Jr.) is captured by the police and turns into a werewolf in his jail cell. Edelmann asks if he can have him, much as a child would ask for a puppy in a store window, and the police agree. After the third night, while trying to cure Larry with the help of the villager hoard (headed by Skelton Knaggs), Edelmann discovers the Frankenstein monster in a series of cove caves, which just so happen to connect to his recently-discovered crypt. And then he goes insane.

The ludicrous nature of this all makes this film quite fun. Old Doc Edelmann has to be thinking "Holy shit! Pay dirt!" when he goes from the banal study of fungal spores to having a vampire, wolfman and a reanimated corpse all inside of his castle walls (which also have a crypt and catacombs) in less than 72 hours. Too bad he goes insane. Bound to happen, I suppose. I do have to mention that one of the best "Dracula moments" in any of the Universal installations takes place when Dracula approaches Edelmann's assistant (Martha O'Driscoll) as she plays the piano. He begins to stare at her ominously, and soon she finds herself playing a haunting piece of music unknown to her. Eerie, yet effective. I was actually surprised that I enjoyed this better than the prior installment, "Son of Dracula." My assessment is that "Son of Dracula's" greatest fault is that it took itself too seriously, a quality that "House of Dracula" thankfully never strives for.

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